Partners

Solid Gives Back

2011-09-09T10:51:00.002-04:00

Our annual United Way Day of Caring was yesterday, and it was great! We had a fabulous group of SunTrust volunteers work very hard painting for our Family Violence Center. They were covered head to toe in both paint and smiles as they "Lived United" through volunteer giving. They really lived up to their "Solid" reputation!

Check out pictures from the day on our Facebook page here.

Partnership Staff Honored as Latino Leader by La Paz

2011-09-07T10:38:00.002-04:00

Lydia Salva, a Partnership advocate, was recently recognized by La Paz for her leadership within the Latino community. Read more about Lydia and her work at Partnership here. Congratulations, Lydia!

Grant provides life planning, job readiness for young women | Nooga.com

2011-08-31T16:04:00.000-04:00

Grant provides life planning, job readiness for young women | Nooga.com

Read about our most recent grant award to build job readiness skills with our young women receiving Partnership services.

Maks is Coming Back!

2011-08-05T14:53:00.001-04:00

Check out our site at www.DancingWithTheStarsChattanooga.com for information on the return of Maksim Chmerkovskiy!

If you missed Maks at our DWTSC event on June 26th, then you'll be happy to know he is returning to Chattanooga for a private performance on Saturday, August 20th. Check out the site for more information!

Verizon Wireless Holds School Supply Drive

2011-08-01T16:33:00.003-04:00

If you live in Athens, TN and are anywhere near the Decatur Place Verizon Wireless store this weekend, make sure to stop by and donate a few school supplies. Verizon is holding a supply drive for Partnership children from August 1st through the 14th to help them get ready for back to school.

We parents know how expensive back to school can be. Between the back to school clothes, backpack, school fees and supplies - it's a wonder we're not all completely broke. The children living in Partnership shelters, such as our domestic violence shelter or our youth group home for boys, can't always afford the luxury of new back to school items. That's where you can help.

Download a flyer at our website and help spread the word. Then make sure to add a few extra pencils and notebooks to your weekend shopping list! It really will be appreciated.

Walk A Mile In Her Shoes-Are YOU man enough?

2011-03-02T13:40:00.013-05:00

On April 16th, 2011, men from all over Chattanooga will literally walk one mile in women's red high-heeled shoes through Coolidge Park. This is a protest for rape, sexual assault and gender violence. Everyone is able to walk. This can include student groups, church groups, and men from all walks of life are scheduled to march. The proceeds from sponsored walkers will benefit Partnership's Sexual Assault Center violence preventions efforts and rape services in the Greater Chattanooga Area. This is a light hearted way to discuss the issue of rape and sexualized violence in our community.

Registration will be available online at http://www.walkamilechatt.com/ and is $25 for men, $10 for women and children 12 and under are free. Shoe rental is additional $5. Men will receive a free, commemorative t-shirt with registration and they will also be available for purchase at the event. For more information, call Partnership at (423) 697-3827. Learn more about the international movement at http://www.walkamileinhershoes.org/.

Sponsor Families in Need for Christmas

2010-12-03T15:04:00.002-05:00

The Christmas season is here and everyone is cheerfully (but frantically!) running around preparing for parties, gift exchanges and dinners. But there are many clients here at the Partnership who aren't so cheerful. Many are not expecting a visit from Ole St. Nick this season because of crisis in their lives. That's why the Partnership does a large-scale gift drive every year to collect gifts for our clients who are not as fortunate. This gift drive is called the Holiday Cheer Campaign.

Elder men and women living at home alone, victims of domestic violence living in shelter with their children, and many others who are dealing with family or personal crisis need help to provide a little bit of Holiday Cheer this year.

Anyone can sponsor an individual or family simply by calling Partnership Volunteer Coordinator, Rosemary Miller, at (423) 697-3830 or emailing her at rmiller@partnershipfca.com. Rosemary will match you with a "Wishlist for Santa" and you shop for the client just as you would shop for your spouse, best friend, or child. Drop your items off at the Partnership's 1800 McCallie Avenue office by December 15 and our own little elves will deliver the presents. It's that easy!

Of course, if you do not like to shop you can still help out. Simply visit partnershipfca.com and make an online donation to be used to purchase the client's wishlist items. Same end result - no shopping required!

Many are in need this year, and sponsorships are lower at this point than they have been in previous years. We sure could use your help.

Merry Christmas!

Domestic Violence Kills

2010-09-17T10:43:00.002-04:00

Many of you have heard about the tragic murder of a local woman at the hands of domestic violence. The Partnership's Crisis Services is still reeling from the news. We want to tell as many people as possible that help is available to them and their families. We want them to know about our 24/7 Crisis Hotline that provides confidential, often life-saving assistance, to victims of domestic violence. Victims do not have to suffer. Please call (423) 755-2700 if you are being abused. Someone is available at all times to help you and your family get to safety. You don't have to hurt anymore.

CRISIS HOTLINE 423-755-2700

Celebrate Recovery Today - National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month

2010-09-10T12:24:00.002-04:00

There are over 23 million Americans currently being treated for drug and alcohol addiction. They are on the road to recovery. This is the 20th year celebrating National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month. Partnership Counseling Center joined the celebration today starting with a march across the Walnut Street Bridge and ending with a community presentation at Miller Plaza. Both city and county mayor offices recognized today's celebration with proclomations.

More important though, have been the stories recovering addicts have shared publicly today. As I sit here writing this now, a local artist is sharing his story of recovery and how CADAS helped him rebuild his life. A previous recovering addict, who was an attorney previously, shared his story of addiction to meth. A local nurse shared how she quite smoking after 35 years and reminded the audience that nicotine is also a drug. One consistent message of all the recovering addicts was that help is out there.

The Partnership Counseling Center is one of the many resources in Chattanooga. Cal 423-697-7130 to schedule a confidential appointment.

DWTSC Thank You to Supporters

2010-06-28T18:34:00.002-04:00

Thanks to everyone who participated in some way in Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga! Saturday night was amazing! We had nearly 900 people in attendance, packing the Tivoli and Tivoi Centre for what had to be the best after party. Our own Lynda Hood raised over $7,000 to win the Fan Favorite Award - with all her proceeds benefiting the Partnership's Sexual Assault Center.

Alexis Bogo won the Dancing Champion Award, receiving high scores from the judges and a ton of votes from the audience. Her Fred Astaire instructor and partner was Kyle Barel. Way to go guys.

It was a close race for everyone. And everyone did such a great job. Josh McManus called on his Elvis alter ego, Ed Harrison was a Womanizer, Kelly Brexler nailed her finishing position (as seen in Sunday's Times Free Press!), and Dr. Marc Cromie pulled out all the stunts to Bring Sexy Back.

And if you haven't hears already, our guest star Maxsim Chrmerkovskiy auctioned off his pants for a whopping $2,100 -- and then sold another pair for the same price! He and Nicole Volynets were such professionals, and their dances were amazing!!

Can't wait to start planning for next year. Not sure how we'll top nearly 1,000 people in one of the city's best venues - with one of the best DWTS performers. But I bet you we'll do it!

Last week for tickets and voting!

2010-06-22T11:52:00.003-04:00

Hi guys! This is the last week to buy your tickets to the much anticipated event, Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga. Tickets are selling fast so don't miss your chance to see Max from ABC's Dancing with the Stars as well as your local dancers. This is also the last week to send in your fan vote for your favorite dancer.

So, don't miss out and visit dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com now!

Check Out Our Moves

2010-05-24T06:11:00.002-04:00

Our six local star dancers have been rehearsing for weeks in preparation for the June 26th DWTSC event and we have a little rehearsal footage for you to see! Each day this week, and each week leading up to June 26th, we'll have a little sneak peek for you. These are just little glimpses of our dancers' progress from beginning to end of their practices at the Fred Astaire Dance Studio. Music has been edited so the final performances will be surprise. Click on the video links to the right and ENJOY!

Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga - The Beginning of Fan Favorite Voting

2010-05-06T05:47:00.003-04:00

Our dancing stars are practicing in back-to-back sessions now. Working through choreography with the instructors at Fred Astaire, trying on their dancing shoes for the first time, deciding on their music selection (which is going to be great, I have to tell you), and thinking about costuming. And let me remind you that each of our stars have full-time jobs. So it's not as if they have a lot of free time right now. Yet they still keep showing up to practice and take whatever is thrown at them, all to make sure DWTSC is a great event and a great fundraiser for the Partnership. And, I suppose, to make sure they don't trip up in front of 1,600 people at the Tivoli.

You would think that's enough to handle, right? But we're talking about our Chattanooga Stars. And these folks always go the extra mile. That's how they've become community leaders in their own fields. So it's no big deal for them to already be getting geared up for the DWTSC Fan Favorite Award contest.

The Fan Favorite Award will go to the dancer who receives the most pre-event votes for them. The contest puts the "fun" back in "fundraising" by allowing fans to make a donation that will directly support a specific program area of the Partnership, while also voting for their favorite dancer. The results are updated nightly on each dancer's bio at www.dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com . Fans can vote by text, by online donation, or by giving donations directly to the dancer if they so choose.

And each dancer seems to be developing their own campaign. Take Ed Harrison for example. He's set up a new Facebook page and has already received the first two online votes of the event! Ed is also donating his two free Green Room tickets (a.k.a. best seats in the house!) to one of his supporters who makes a donation over $20. We will randomly select a Fan before the event to receive the tickets. So make sure to check out his page and show your support.

Check back here regularly for event updates and comments from our dancers!

Day 6 Friday

2010-04-30T15:51:00.007-04:00

Friday My Last Day Tennessee Here I come

The Mix Club for Kids

I think today was my favorite day. Samuel came and picked me up and took to me to the Mix Club that he works at some afternoons near Duha. It is like a Rec Center and right in the middle of the Pentagon. Great name huh? The Pentagon is a housing project that mostly Gypsies live in and there are a lot of drugs in the area. Samuel says people in the community are afraid of people who live in the Pentagon. Aren't we all, maybe for different reasons.

Anyway, I was quite alarmed to hear the first rule of the club. Children must smoke outside. .... Yes you heard it right. It is a reality here. It is illegal to sell to children under 15 but many children under 15 smoke. Wow. Again the walls were painted, you can see where they painted the outside. Samuel gave me a cd of songs that 2 boys, ages 14 and 16, made singing gypsy and slovak songs. It was amazing. They were so good. Very professional. If I were smart enough I would put some of it on the blog. I think it can be done... maybe.

Then we visited my young friends Rene and Kevin from my last visit 3 years ago. They are now in a children's home outside Bratislava. I did not know if they would remember me, but I was hoping. Of course I took them Tennessee Volunteer Football hats. What kind of person would I be if I didn't.... right? They were very pleased. Rene said he would come to Tennessee and play foot ball. Rene remembered me, he is the same age as my son Noah, but Kevin who is the age of my son Joel did not. Rene had used up most of my video tape during my visit to Duha and remembered using my camera. The other children at the home had many questions about America. They wanted to know if I knew Tu Pac and 50 Cents. Apparently rap is very big among teens. Samuel says among gypsy children rap and gangs are a very popular image of America. Not much to be said for that.

I gave the boys my card and told them to learn English and they can email or write to me. I hope they will finish school.

The last event of my day (before packing and flying home to my wonderful family) was to meet Eva and Igor her husband in the old city for a very important reception for the former Prime Minister (I think- anyway he was very important) who had written a book with the former PM from the Czeck Repbulic. It was a policical event and a book signing all in one. Igor works for him which is how I got a special invitation. It was very interesting. After the speeches, they christened the book. I can't think of any other way to say it. They took water and poured it over the book like a christening.

Here is a famous actor I don't know and the former Prime Minister getting ready to pour water on the book.

Last but not least, I saw the people watcher in his window again today. I have looked for him every day to no avail, but today he was there. A very nice ending to a great week. I am very thankful to the Partnership, Chattanooga Rotary Club, Bryan College and Dennis Miller who helped make this week happen. I hope some community change begins to occur and that maybe I have planted some seeds. Chow - See you in Chattanooga

Day 5 Bratislava On the Downside Now

2010-04-30T03:01:00.010-04:00

Flowers in the park

Brana di Zivota "Gate to the Life" was a great visit today. I met with the Director Gabriella and her staff. Two of them spoke English which helped. They have a similar program to the Partnership shelter and serve 12 women with children. They also have a children without parents shelter and house young people aging out of shelter care.

As throughout my trip, the thing that I was interested in was how they collaborated with other programs in the community to lobby for funding and to create a coalition to speak for victims rights. That is a very new concept here, so maybe I planted some seeds. I hope so. Education and prevention of domestic violence; rape; homelessness and other social issues are not high on priority lists partially because there are few staff to do the work (which I totally understand). But I am also not sure there is full recognition of how prevention can be related to education efforts. They do not do psycho-educational groups on domestic violence with the women in their shelter with topics about the cycle of abuse; indicators of abuse; effects on children; safety planning etc. These issues are usually worked on one on one in meetings with the psychologist. I encouraged them to do the classes with all women they work with. Very important concept because domestic violence impact everyone.

They would like for me to send them our support group program on domestic violence. I am very excited about that.

Eva and a few of her class

In the afternoon I taught a class for my friend Eva Havelkova at the University Performing Arts. I talked about the Partnership and our project in Slovakia, but I focused my topic on the history of the oppression of women; domestic violence; rape and dating relationships. They were quite amazed at some of the things I said. They do not talk about those issues here and especially dating violence. I brought some cards I received from the Tennessee Coalition against Domestic and Sexual Violence created through the TNBLUE.org website. the students had never seen anything like it. We briefly talked about rights in a dating relationship... again a very foreign concept.

I focused on how important my understanding of my history was to how I create change in my community. Many of the students here do not even learn about being under communism and it was only 20 years ago. They do not know about oppression and it is not taught to them to my understanding. So.... I gave them a lesson in oppression and civic responsibility. I asked Eva later if I could be arrested for the things I may have said. Not since 1989.

Later in the day as I was walking back to the boat I saw some of the most beautiful flowers in bloom and then a saw some people rowing. Life here is not as fast paced as at home. Even though the week will soon be over, the hours are not frantic ,filled with due dates; PQI reports; grants due; too many meetings to attend; and never ending work with no time to complete it. It has been so nice to put that away for a week and focus on one thing at a time and enjoy each moment of time not worrying about the next one. However, I miss my family and can't wait to seem them Saturday. It seems like a month since I hugged and kissed my boys.

Day 4 Wednesday.

2010-04-28T17:22:00.011-04:00

Bratislava Day 4

check out the artwork on these shelter walls.

A very busy day. I was up at 8 and it is not almost midnight. I have not slowed down today and tomorrow will be similar. Dasa took me to Majak today. Wow. I met the social worker, who explained their program and showed me around. Check out the walls. Its that way all over the shelter. They have 60 women currently being sheltered and 25 children. My staff won't believe this but the social worker is the only one who works with them like our case managers at the Partnership. So the ratio is 1 to 60 compared to 1 to maximum 5 or 6. Hmmm. We think we are overworked Ouch. The program is very similar in ways to ours.

One thing that struck me was the expressed need to control things. We also discussed the cycle of violence and in many cases alcohol and drugs are blamed on domestic violence here. I shared my first encounter with the Lenore Walker books on domestic violence and the cycle of violence. I shared that I believe that those things exacerbate the behavior but they do not cause it and if we let it be an excuse we are not holding abusers accountable.

We also discussed the importance of education as a key to prevention and changing the environment of complacency in Bratislava. No one seems to think domestic violence is a big deal, not my problem. Again the issue of funding came up. With no coalition of programs, there are no strong lobbying voices to help speak out for social issues, funding and services.

It seems that economic growth is more important than social issues. I think when the social issues are sleeping in the mall entrance or asking for handouts in the mall, maybe things will change. I think when women and children die at the hands of abusers because no one thinks is their problem; I think when someone important's family is impacted by domestic violence, things will change. I think when the daughter of an important person is raped, things will change. I ask myself, why does it have to be this way. And then I think...isn't that what happened here in America; Tennessee and yes Chattanooga and sometimes still happens.

It was great to see this very large shelter and know that women are being helped at least for now.

After my visit, I went to buy tennis shoes and chocolate. My feet will be eternally grateful. Then I met my great Friend Eva Havelkova and Dasa and we went to see the opera Faust. It was a tragedy. Very sad. I had forgotten my college literature. Even with the Italian song and Slovak translation it was still sad. Tomorrow I go to Brana de Zivota and visit another shelter and then will lecture at Eva's class at the University. Chow

Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga - Big Announcement Coming!

2010-04-28T09:49:00.002-04:00

We have a big announcement coming this Saturday that we are just soooo excited about! If you came to the Partnership's Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga event last year, you know what a great time was had by all. This year's event is going to be even bigger and better in so many ways! We have six WONDERFUL dancers from the local talent pool known as Chattanooga. We have a sizzling special guest dancer from the actual ABC hit show, Dancing with the Stars. If you loved Tony Dovolani and Elena Grinenko last year, you will surely love our guest star this year!

We have a new venue which will maximize the performance, and will provide LOTS of seating to accomodate everyone who wants to see the show! We sold out last year, over two weeks before the event.

Make sure to check our website at www.partnershipfca.com this Saturday - May 1st - to see who our guest dancer is and who our local performers will be! Also - make sure to pick up a copy of Chatter Magazine and the Times Free Press for these special announcements.

Many thanks to our presenting sponsor, First Tennessee, for making this event possible. And to the Chattanooga Times Free Press for print sponsorship of DWTSC 2010!

Bratislava Day 3

2010-04-27T18:28:00.014-04:00

See you Soon.Some things are the same no matter where you go in the world: families, adults relaxing in a park, children playing in a park or trying to feed the birds, dandelions (I saw some today), relationships beginning and ending, birth, death. Some social issues are the same too. We see domestic violence, sexual assault, child abuse, homelessness, hunger in every country.

I took a picture of St. Michael's Tower which is so beautiful to me but on closer look....

I saw this homeless man in the archway. Later when I was walking across the bridge to Petrazalka I saw two more homeless men sitting under the freeway on the sidewalk in what looked like they were preparing for the night. Erie Chapman, the author of Radical Loving Care, advances the idea of the Good Samaritan and the idea in the story is the golden thread that is found in every great faith through history as well as the humanitarian tradition. He says that "love not only sits at the center of humanity but that love can be present in all people and all things." He also says that charitable work is sacred and that "without the guidance of love humanity is degraded to lower forms of living... and human life itself lacks meaning". Pretty heavy stuff, huh.?

Homeless people are in every country, around the world.

I did do some relaxing stuff today. I walked forever and soaked up with my eyes so much architecture, beauty and sense of history and awe. There is this feeling in my brain like I get when I am traveling I24 from Nashville to Chattanooga just past Monteagle Mountain and I see the mountains to the right. It always takes my breath away in Spring and Fall.

On a practical note, I have figured out how to stay cool in the Botel. I have taken out the entire window. American ingenuity. Much cooler. I have also started my own little travel guide for Women Travelers (who are not the jet-setting type if you know what I mean on a social workers salary). A few of them are: 1) always bring tennis shoes; 2) always bring your own paper products and 3) always pack extra clothes in your carry on.

I am going to have to find chocolate for the 5th graders at Brainerd Baptist School and since they want chocolate, I bet the 2nd graders will too. I've been told to buy German Chocolate - not Polish. We shall see. I also must buy tennis shoes. My feet are killing me and I continue to trip. I tripped again today but did not completely fall down. Good catch.

I will be going to Majak Nadeje ( Lighthouse of Hope) tomorrow. I have gifts from the Partnership and look forward to our time together tomorrow. I finished my PowerPoint today for my lecture. It is a motivational piece on activism. Surprised? The rest of the week will be busy. It is late.

Good night.

Bratislava Day 2

2010-04-26T14:16:00.009-04:00

Dasa

Day 2 Bratislava

Last night I went to dinner with Dasa (Dagmar), Paulko (her husband) and Samuel (our friend who visited Partnership from Duha). Dasa is the Director of the shelter and started it in 2006. Anyway, I fell down the stairs coming from my room to go and meet my friends. Luckily it was just the last stair, I did no serious harm, and I did not feel too unembarrassed. It's not like I will ever see any of the 7 or 8 strangers in the room who clearly did not speak English ever again. C'est la Vie. We walked to a nice restaurant and then up to the Castle (Hrad) Bratislava. There is a great deal of history in Bratislava.

The Castle was partially destroyed at one time by Napoleon Bonaparte and there are also remnants of a Roman Encampment also on the grounds of the castle. It has been repaired many times over many centuries going as far as the 9th century. Makes America seem very young by comparison. Okay,enough of the meager history lesson.

I must also tell you how much I miss my children, husband, cold drinks and ice. Europeans are not much for cold beverages and certainly not ice. I also know why you don't see huge percentages of obese persons in this part of the world as well. They walk everywhere or bike. Samuel bikes 10 miles to work every day. That's crazy I say. Common practice here.

Today I went to Duha and saw some of my colleagues from my previous visit. It was a good visit. they have hanging in the stair way the T-shirts from the T-Shirt project we did when I stayed in 2007. The children in the shelter do many types of wonderfully creative art which I hope to duplicate back home.

Their shelter has many of the same problems our shelter faces every day. They face funding cuts. Dasa told me if the government currently in power continues to cut social services like the Crisis Center they will close after next year. My very passionate opinion that I shared with Dasa and Samuel is that young people are not social activists. They don't vote based on my conversation with Samuel. If there is to be a future for domestic violence victims; rape victims; children who are abused; the homeless and others in need, the community (i.e. the young people) must become motivated to change the current climate of politics and not accept the status quo.

I only wish someone had talked to me about these issues when I was 2o. I wonder what I might have done with that power at such an early age. I see women like Dagmar and Eva Havelkova who believe in the rights of women and children and stand up for victims. I only wish there were an army of Dasa's and Eva's in Bratislava, making life safer for victims of domestic violence, human trafficking; child abuse; rape and other crimes. (Sorry I got on my soap box.)

I hope that things change here so Duha and the other centers can continue to make a difference the lives of women and children affected by domestic violence and homelessness. Much education is needed and Dasa does not have enough staff to do the daily operations of the shelter and outreach also. I know that story only too well. We suffer the same fate. Education is the key to prevention.

I feel so privileged to work and live in a country where I truly believe one voice can make a difference. We have to make our voices heard about violence against women and children. Men must take a stand against violence. While most individuals who abuse are men; most men are not abusers. Men can make the difference and help us change the world.

Well it is past my bed time. I have been to McDonalds for supper tonight and tomorrow have a free day. I will let you know how that turns out. Chow.

Bratislava and Domestic Violence

2010-04-26T05:52:00.002-04:00

[Posted by Regina McDevit, Director of Crisis Services at the Partnership]
My first blog post. Ever....and I am doing it from another country. I have already had to figure out how to change the language at the top back to English from Slovenske. As my husband would say....computer literacy is a challenge for me. Please remember I am a novice.

I am so excited be visiting for the 3rd time, thanks to Dennis Miller; Bryan College and the Chattanooga Rotary Club and of course the Partnership. I have had the privelege and honor to consult with programs working with victims of domestic violence in Bratislava for 4 years. Domestic violence and other forms of violence against women are very much a thriving activity across the world. Sadly, many countries are 20 to 30 years behind the United States.

The Bratislava programs and my good friend and human rights expert Eva Havelkova is interested in quality of services that the Partnership provides to victims and the multi service aspect. There are no agencies similar in Slovakia.

I have worked with the Duha Shelter since 2007 and can't wait to see all of my friends there this week.

I arrived yesterday and my luggage arrived today (for which I am very grateful). I can now dry my hair and use my curling iron and computer. I have had only one altercation with a taxi driver who was not happy when I did not believe he was giving me a good price to my hotel. Thankfully my friend Dagmar and her husband showed up right after that and I did not have to discuss the matter any longer. I am trying to figure out the Euro and think I may have been ripped off but since I can't count it I don't know. I shall ask Samuel, our friend from Duha that visited Partnership in February, about the currency.

I saw this dog looking out the window on my way to the old city center today. He was people watching.

Tomorrow I hope to visit one of the shelters. I will also visit 2 young brothers about the ages of my sons. They were at Duha shelter last visit and now they are in another shelter. I hope they remember me. They were abandoned by their parents and have no one to care for them. There are 2 new domestic violence shelters in Bratislava since my last visit. That is good news. I shall keep you posted on my adventures.

The Dogwood Shop

2010-04-05T14:55:00.001-04:00

If there was ever a time for thriftiness, it’s now. Luckily, there are entire shops devoted to thrift where you can go to save money for more important things like food and rent. If you’ve lived in Chattanooga for any time at all, you know where to find the big thrift stores, but they’re not the only ones around. One of the smaller stores, the Dogwood Shop in Hixson, is actually run by the Partnership. I paid a visit to the Dogwood shop recently and spoke to Sue, the proprietor, and Betty, one of her many volunteer workers.

Dogwood has been around for sixteen years, and Sue has worked there for eleven of those. It was originally owned by The Cancer Society, then it changed to Lutheran Services, and last February marked the store’s fifth year with the Partnership. The transition from Lutheran Services to the Partnership was smooth according to Sue. She told me that the Partnership is a good organization that lets her do her own thing, which seems to be working for her.

Besides Sue, the Dogwood Shop is staffed by elderly volunteers. Many of her volunteers, including Betty, have been at the shop for close to ten years, almost as long as her, and a few have been there even longer. Some are in their 80’s and still working for the simple joy of it, but most of them are around 70. Betty takes clothes and other crafts home and mends them, and her husband pitches in as well by fixing watches and performing any technicall work he can get his hands on. “If he can fix it he will,” Sue said. He often mends jewelry, and he recently repaired a manger made out of olive wood by meticulously cutting new pieces to replace the ones that had broken away.

“They’re just wonderful ladies,” Sue said. “They do what they like to do.”

They must like what they do (after all, they’re still volunteering when they don’t have to work any more) but that doesn’t mean that their work is easy. “We work very hard to keep everything looking nice,” Sue said. Everyone pitches in with mending and cleaning – and make no mistake, everything needs to be mended or cleaned. If you buy something from the Dogwood Shop, you can rest assured that it has been thoroughly washed, disinfected, scrubbed, washed again, steamed, ironed, stitched, and patched.

They sell more than linens, clothes and decorations though – a whole wall and another shelf near the counter was full to bursting with every kind of book. The Grumpy’s that used to be next door to the shop has moved, and McKay’s recently moved farther away from most of the area’s customers as well, which has led to slightly increased book donations. This is good for us bibliophiles because Dogwood’s markup is noticeably less than the two big used bookstores.

There isn’t a lot of rhyme or reason to the donations that the shop gets and the business they do, but a few things can be counted on: inclement weather is bad for business, as is the Christmas season, oddly enough. They do the best business at the beginning of each season, when people are repurposing their wardrobes to the changing temperatures, but Spring and Summer, when people are having yard sales and donating anything left over, are the peak.

As with everything else, the Dogwood Shop has been hurt by the recession. This didn’t make sense at first (after all, what better time to shop at a thrift store than an economic climate that requires thriftiness) but Sue reminded me that most of a thrift store’s clientele shop there no matter what, and a recession means that that customer base often goes from having just enough money to shop at stores like Dogwood to having almost none.

On a lighter note, McCallie recently donated sixty-five prom dresses to the Dogwood Shop. There were fifty left when I spoke to Sue, but it’s been a few weeks since then. There should still be some left though – she told me that their sizes ran small, which was keeping them from flying off the shelves. Still, I had a look at them, and there isn’t a thing wrong with them. If prom isn’t already over and you or a girl you know doesn’t already have a dress, you can’t go wrong taking a look at Dogwood’s selection.

Homemaker Services

2010-03-30T11:47:00.006-04:00

“A test of a people is how it behaves toward the old. It is easy to love children. Even tyrants and dictators make a point of being fond of children. But the affection and care for the old, the incurable, the helpless are the true gold mines of a culture.”
–Abraham J. Heschel

The first program I looked at when I started writing for the Partnership was the Elderly and Disabled Victims Program, and in my post on it I talked about how important it is to take care of the elderly – if not out of respect then at least through the selfish realization that we will all be in their shoes given enough time. There is more to caring for the elderly than saving them from abuse though, and the Partnership provides more long-term care through its Homemaker Services.

I recently met up with Sheryl Dungan, a caseworker with Homemaker Services, and shadowed her while she worked. She explained to me that homemakers visit clients once or twice a week to help with cleaning, groceries, laundry, meals, and access to community resources to help with things like bills, expenses and room and board. They also drive clients to doctor visits, pick up their medicine, help with essential shopping for items such as clothing, and write out checks. Clients don’t always need all of these services, but they are all available. Each of the program’s homemakers is attached to one of its two caseworkers, who in turn visit clients regularly to make sure that adequate service is being provided in addition to organizing and coordinating the work of the homemakers. “Our goal is to keep them at home,” she said, “to maintain self-sufficiency.”

On this day Sheryl was checking up on a very special client named Roberta. Roberta has devoted her whole life to caring for others – she has raised a whole generation of foster children and was herself a homemaker until she was 78 years old. I was too polite to ask how old she was, but she gave me her birthday and let me do the math*. She is so used to helping others that she has trouble sitting back and letting others do for her now, but when I met her she was so tired from a marathon church session the night before (she still sings in the choir) that her protests were more playful than anything.

Roberta’s homemaker is Brenda, an affable woman in scrubs who works harder in a day than I do in a week and complains much less, but that could be said about almost anyone at the Partnership. Brenda’s been with the program fifteen years, during which time she has only seen one man hired. She winked as she told me that she’s also seen one man quickly leave because he couldn’t handle the work (Eat your heart out Mike Rowe). She worked in a nursing home before coming to Homemaker Services, and while we all understand that nursing homes are sometimes necessary, her experience with them is part of what drives her to do everything she can to keep her elderly clients living in their own homes. She also explained to me what’s entailed in essential shopping; it’s not just food and medicine, it’s also things like books. Books might not seem necessary, but one of her clients is on dialysis, and without his books to read he would be stuck at the hospital staring at a wall for hours on end.

Brenda took a break when we arrived, and we all sat down around Roberta. The three of them spent a long time talking about their experiences as homemakers, remembering triumphs and failures (the latter are surprisingly few), as well as moments of laughter and sadness and the strange hybrids of the two that working with the elderly can often bring. So many of their stories ended with one of them asking, “Whatever happened to her?” and another softly saying, “They passed on,” that I had to ask how they deal with the constant loss that goes hand-in-hand with serving a population at the twilight of life. The recipe seems to be a potent mix of faith and a very stubborn sort of grace, but they’re still not immune to the effects of death. “That’s the most painful thing for all of us,” Brenda said about clients who pass on.

They also told me that the program’s funding is in danger – there is a very real possibility that at the end of this contract year Homemaker Services will no longer be able to pay two caseworkers, which will mean a loss of service for vulnerable elders as far away as Rhea County. That was something to be worried about another time however, because now was the time for work. I would like to say that I did a lot to help, but by the time I had changed Roberta’s linens the floors had been mopped and vacuumed and the garbage and laundry had been carried out - I felt a little useful all the same. As Sheryl and I prepared to leave, Roberta took our hands, smiled, and said, “Thank you, I love you, sweeties.”

We love you too, Roberta.

“Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant with the weak and the wrong. Sometime in your life you will have been all of these.” –Dr. Robert H. Goddard

*It’s 1918 if you want to play the home game.

Building Stable Lives

2010-03-15T16:26:00.005-04:00

Unless you’re one of the richest 1% of Americans, you have probably been or felt poor at some point in your life. There is poor and then there is poor though, and while some of us might have had to suffer the embarrassment of reduced lunch and too-big hand-me-downs, or drafty one room apartments and a steady diet of ramen and rice, I hope that most of us will never wonder if, without help, without some intervention, we might starve, might lose our homes, might not be able to give our children the basics for living let alone a prosperous life.

But this is the reality of life for many people in America, far too many – as of 2008, nearly 15% of American Households were food insecure. There are programs in place to help people without access to food, such as United Way’s 211, but 211 and other programs like it are stopgaps, meant to get people through brief periods of urgent need. Serious poverty is a relentless monster, however, and many people find themselves calling for assistance over and over in a given year. Obviously the help they’re receiving isn’t doing anything for the core problem, that circumstances in their lives have brought them to a place where they can’t acquire the basics of human survival.

One of the areas with the greatest number of repeat callers in Chattanooga is East Lake, which has some of the highest poverty and unemployment rates and lowest high school graduation rates in the city. In other words, the area is a perfect storm of all the factors contributing to poverty and hunger, and it has the fewest resources available to aid in these problems. But how can that be helped, other than giving people food and monetary aid? For Raquel Hidalgo and the “Building Stable Lives” initiative, the solution is – as usual – not a handout so much as a hand up.

The biggest problem facing most of the families she deals with is a lack of work, which takes not only a financial but a psychological toll as well. This has gotten worse recently, as rising unemployment leaves people of all educational backgrounds scrambling to find any employment, leaving the poor of areas like East Lake, who often don’t even have a GED, to compete for work with high school and college graduates. Construction, labor and production have been good sources of work for those without high school diplomas in the past, but few construction projects are initiated in an economic climate like this one and those are temporary anyway – once the building is finished the job is done. Labor and production have been dwindling for years, giving way to a service based economy as the industrial and agricultural work of our parents and grandparents is moved out of the country. The logical solution is to go back to school or at the very least get a GED, but when food is scarce, children are crying, and the stresses of living in poverty pile up on every side, it can be difficult if not impossible to rally the time or the psychological energy, let alone the money, to do so. This is where Raquel comes in: she helps families in crisis take inventory of their lives and shows them ways to work within their circumstances to pull themselves out of their current chaos.

One of the most important services she provides for her clients is showing them how to get a GED and, beyond that, how to achieve even higher levels of education. Many have begun the process of getting their GED, many have already gotten it, and a few have even enrolled in classes at Chattanooga State. She also gives her clients access to computers and shows them how to use them to find work and handle their resources – something that many of us consider incidental but which have become almost necessary for full participation in society, since even the lowest paying jobs are moving to exclusively handling the application process online. Little things like computer illiteracy can add up to a severe handicap, and helping with these problems is a large part of Raquel’s work.

But working and thinking, jobs and education, those are the keys. Those are the foundation around which all the other work, all the other assistance, is done, and it really is staggering the dignity that meaningful labor can bring a person who thought they were useless, the hope that education can bring do a mind that has been for too long turned inward in despair and frustration. What Raquel and the rest of the Partnership provide for the people they help is not a crutch or charity, but – as I’ve said over and over – empowerment and the freedom to be productive. I will leave you with a quote from The Grapes of Wrath that, to me, sums up exactly what we mean when we use the E word:

The last clear definite function of man-muscles aching to work, minds aching to create beyond the single need-this is man. To build a wall, to build a house, a dam, and in the wall and house and dam to put something of Manself, and to Manself take back something of the wall, the house, the dam; to take hard muscles from the lifting, to take the clear lines and form from conceiving. For man, unlike any other thing organic or inorganic in the universe, grows beyond his work, walks up the stairs of his concepts, emerges ahead of his accomplishments.

Deaf Services

2010-03-09T11:08:00.004-05:00

Finding a job is hard. Keeping a job once you’ve found one can be just as hard. I know how difficult these things can be firsthand, but until recently I’d never considered just how much more difficult they could be. I have spent a lot of time mulling over all sorts of privilege, but it was shocking to realize just how complacent I’d been in my own abled privilege. What if a prospective employer wrote me off immediately because they assumed I was incompetent due to a disability? What if that same employer wrote me off just because my presence made them uncomfortable? These are only a couple of the difficulties faced by PWDs (People With a Disability), but each disability comes with its own difficulties as well. What if, for example, I was perfectly qualified for a job but lost it because I couldn’t communicate with an employer who would rather take someone less qualified than expend any effort on communication? The difficulty of working or even living in an environment where communication is difficult or impossible was brought to my attention when I spoke with the women in the La Amiga program, but it applies to another group as well – the deaf.

One reason my abled privilege took so long to dawn on me, at least where deaf people are concerned, is that none of the deaf people I have ever met – admittedly not many – seemed “disabled.” In fact when left to their own devices or among other deaf people they got by just as well as anyone else. Sure, they couldn’t hear, but they had access to a sophisticated visual language capable of conveying just as much specificity and meaning as any vocal one, and in a culture as literate and digital as ours what else would a person really need hearing for other than speaking with hearing people? The only time the deaf people I knew seemed frustrated or ill-equipped was when they had to do that very thing, and even then their difficulties more closely resembled those of a foreigner than a PWD*.

Still, calling interaction with the hearing a deaf person’s “only” difficulty is a bit of a mischaracterization – they live every day of their lives in a culture built by and for hearing people who communicate through sound. If they’re lucky enough to live in a town of any size they will have access to a community of other deaf people to communicate with, but otherwise virtually everyone they meet, from cashiers to judges to mothers to friends, will not understand them or be understood by them. Also, because most of the social and emotional aspects of human communication are non-verbal and visual, they will be able to pick up on the annoyance, confusion, impatience, or pity in hearing people they try to communicate with.

This is unfortunate because no matter how competent a person is otherwise, a stumbling block this size can have drastic effects on their self-esteem and confidence, and once those are taken away self determination becomes almost impossible. Almost impossible and completely impossible aren’t the same however, and the Partnership is one of many groups across the country that offers services to help deaf people find employment, live independently, and regain and maintain confidence in their own abilities.

One such case is Olga Olegovna Sidlinskiy, a 17-year old daughter of a family of Russian immigrants, and one of nine children. She is the only member of her family who is deaf but even so, when her father became unemployed and her working-age siblings got jobs to support the family, Olga – who had never worked before - decided that it was only right to pitch in. However, she wasn’t sure what to do or how to do it until a staff member at the Harvest Christian Academy for the Deaf in Ringgold directed her to Sharon Bryant and the Partnership’s deaf services program.

It’s important to remember that deaf services, just like all of the Partnership’s other programs, works first and foremost to make it so that people won’t "need" help – empowering people to build better lives again. It would probably be easier (and cheaper) to hand people like Olga a proverbial fish and send them on their way, but they need to be fed for the rest of their lives. So Sharon opened her tackle box and got to work.

She helped Olga put together a resume, explained how the interview process works, and helped facilitate communication between Olga and her potential employers. Olga then went on, despite the abysmal state of the job market, to find work at an Olive Garden where her manager has nothing but praise for her and she is actually teaching her coworkers some signing. Like the other 36+ clients Sharon has helped in her two and a half years with the Partnership, Olga now has more than a job. She has something that most of the rest of us take advantage of every day: self determination.

*Speaking slower and louder works about as well on a deaf person as it does on, say, a Parisian, and it generally elicits the same reaction.

The Family Financial Counselor

2010-02-23T12:09:00.004-05:00

Last February, almost exactly a year ago, U.S. Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke said that there was, “a reasonable prospect that the current recession will end in 2009 and that 2010 will be a year of recovery.”

Whoops.

He was right, after a fashion: industrial production, manufacturing, trade and sales have all recovered from their recession nadirs. The problem is that most of us aren’t sharp-featured Randian captains of industry and as such aren’t in charge of industrial production, manufacturing, trade and sales – the only way we normies get a benefit from these recoveries is if they create jobs. And they haven’t. Unemployment is, in fact still on the rise. Even for those Americans who are secure in their jobs, pay cuts are a distinct possibility and any hope of a raise will likely need to be deferred for almost a decade.

Still, things could be worse – and they have been. This might be the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression, but it’s still not actually the Great Depression. And anyway, isn’t part of the American character our ability to buckle down, slam our noses into the grindstone, grit our teeth, and shoulder through any adversity that rears its ugly head? Isn’t that what our parents, grandparents or great-grandparents (as the case may be) did during the 30’s? Surely we can do the same under somewhat easier circumstances, right?

Not without help, it turns out. Apparently most of us aren’t the same hard-nosed, leather-skinned, nail chewing paragons of the working class our forebears were, but that’s alright, because help is available in the form of Linda Rath, the Partnership’s Family Financial Counselor. I sat down with Linda recently and asked her a little about what she does with the Partnership.

My primary function is to work with families who are seeking services for the
first time ever in their adult lives. People who have always worked, always
managed to pay the bills, but now some crisis has hit. Because of the recession
they have been downsized or they’re still working at the same company but they
had to take a huge pay cut, or they’ve been living based on overtime and there
is no more overtime. So lots of situations are occurring out there where people
who are still employed are really underemployed and can no longer pay the bills.

It is Linda’s job to fix that last part, because it turns out that a lot of what people do while they’re working and in the weeks and months after they lose their job or take a hit in pay has a huge effect on how hard unemployment hits them. According to Linda, when most people find themselves suddenly unemployed or working for less money than before, they try as hard as they can to maintain the lifestyle they had before – which was just as unhealthy, as you will see below – through credit and high interest loans, assuming that something will come along to get them back where they were within a few weeks or months. I think you can guess how that usually turns out. Add to that, even when working decent paying jobs, financial responsibility is still pretty rare.

Half of all people in the United States actually spend more than they earn each
month – but they don’t really feel like they are in debt or stressed because
there’s always another paycheck coming, which is going to catch it up and
they’re going to be fine.

In addition to living paycheck to paycheck, around half of Americans also have very little to no savings, according to Linda. She says that it is absolutely vital to keep three to six months’ worth of reserve funds set aside at all times in case of an emergency or a bout of unemployment – something I should probably start doing. “It’s virtually impossible to go through your entire life without some period of unemployment,” Linda said.

This stuff should all be expected when it comes to financial troubles though, really. We hear about it in the news all the time. What you don’t hear about as much, and what surprised me, was when Linda told me that:

A number of the clients I’m dealing with have got children between the ages of
eighteen and twenty-two living at home with them contributing nothing to the
household, and they can’t afford to continue to support their children and
that’s part of what is an issue to them. They’re not going to school and they’re
not working.

I mentioned earlier that the reason we cope with economic downturn differently from our forebears is because we are essentially a different sort of people, but that’s not exactly true. We might have been raised with television and fast food, but deep down most of us are still just as proud and stubborn as the Americans of the 30’s – and that’s a problem in this case. One of the biggest obstacles for people seeking help with their money, even when homelessness is imminent, is shame. Once that first call is made, however, many of her clients set their teeth and get to work. “Half of the people I see need just one appointment. They need a wake-up call.”

I mentioned in my first post that part of what the Partnership does is to make sure that people don’t fall through the cracks in the first place, and I think this is an example. Just remember, if you lose your job or find yourself making much less than you did before, there are resources available. Linda told me that she loves her current work and that she wants even more people to call so she can help them. Why not give her a call if you think you could use some help or just your own wake-up call? It is free. The number is 423.421.1367.

MONEY LINKS

annualcreditreport.com - A credit reporting service that is actually free. This website provides, as mandated by the federal government, one free credit report per year.

fdic.gov - A good source for economic and financial news, but this site can also lead to a number of useful resources and tools.

moneychimp.com - A resource for people like me who honestly don't understand a lot about finances on the macro OR the micro scale. It also has a very handy debt calculator that can show you how to make the sorts of payments necessary to actually get out of debt.

The Vagina Monologues

2010-02-16T11:58:00.004-05:00

WARNING: There are going to be words in this article that you might consider “bad.” These words mostly concern the female anatomy. You have been warned.

Editor's note: This performance of The Vagina Monologues benefited the UTC Women's Center Transformation Project and the Partnership's Sexual Assault Center. The intent of this post is to raise awareness of V-Day and the work of the Women's Center and the Partnership. Some content from the original post has been edited. For the full version, please contact hashley@partnershipfca.com.

I wasn’t looking forward to last weekend. Classes had been intense, the weather had blanketed the whole city in slate gray clouds with no sign of relief, and my legion of neuroses were piling up all at once – but that was par for the course, really. What finally tipped the scales was when I realized Valentine’s Day was coming.

(Is there a person on Earth who actually looks forward to Valentine’s Day? Don’t answer if you do - the rest of us might have to come deal with you.)

What was going to be a weekend spent entirely in my pajamas, curled up with a good video-game while I felt sorry for myself was changed at the last minute when I was asked to go check out the UTC Women’s Center and their production of the Vagina Monologues. Ordinarily I would have been excited to see the show. I consider myself a feminist, or a pro-feminist man, or whatever you want to call it, and I’d heard about Eve Ensler’s opus and missed two of the school’s previous annual performances. Remember that it was Valentine’s weekend however – unlike the rest of the year, I was more interested in moping and sighing than I was in social justice.

I went anyway, of course, because it’s kind of my job and honestly what else was I going to do? It would be a good excuse to get out of the house and be sad instead of being sad at home. It turned out that sitting at home was exactly what I would be doing on Friday night anyway thanks to another of this Winter’s sudden, city paralyzing bursts of snow. The next night, however, I arrived at UTC’s Fine Arts Center two hours early, met up with a group of women decked out in awesome pink shirts that read “Vagina!” and got to work.

Work, as it turned out, made use of the “skills” I picked up at terrible retail jobs that I thought I would never need again. We put out t-shirts from three different years of The Vagina Monologues where everyone could see them, as well as sign-up sheets for the Partnership’s "Walk a Mile in Her Shoes" event, and…nobody took the bait.

“Nobody’s buying any shirts,” Sara Peters, head of UTC’s Women’s Center, lamented.

Well of course they weren’t buying any shirts, we weren’t pushing the product*. It was time to see if I still had that retail magic, so I set to work! No-one who passed by that table was free from my aggressive tactics, not even classmates; the money from these shirts went to the Partnership and the Women’s Action Council after all, so decorum could take a back-seat as far as I was concerned.

“Would you like to take a look at our ‘This is what a feminist looks like’ shirts?” I said to a group of men, holding one up for display. “Use them to demonstrate fifteen dollars’ worth of devotion to gender equality, use them get points with a girlfriend, use them to keep relatives you don’t like from talking to you at reunions, use them to cover your abdomen if you’d like, they’re good for all that and more!”

“If you’re as excited about vaginas as I am after that show,” I said to a crowd of people I’d already tried once before the performance, “why not take another look at these fine shirts?” I waved my hand over our whole selection like Vanna White lighting up vowels and smiled. “All the profits go to causes that support vaginas and the people attached to them!”

I don’t remember exactly how many shirts we sold by the end of the night, but it was an integer greater than zero and we got some direct donations besides from particularly charitable theatre goers. So that was nice.

The main event was the show, though, and that’s where my weekend went from, “horrible mope-fest,” to “galvanizing reminder of the work left to do.” However, before I talk about UTC’s performance, some history is in order:

Eve Ensler didn’t intend to write a play at all when she took her first step down the road that would lead to the Vagina Monologues – she just wanted to have a dialogue with her friends. As the conversations with friends went on, she realized that these were things women desperately wanted and needed to discuss but felt too ashamed to or were simply prohibited from it in their daily lives. Then the friends started relating anecdotes from their friends, and friends of their own friends. And then the referrals began. By the time all was said and done, Eve had interviewed over 200 women about their vaginas, and so in 1996 the Monologues were born.

At first Eve performed all of the monologues herself, but within two years the show had become such a phenomenon that others wanted to get in on the action. This is how the V-Day event got started; Miss Ensler, who was approached after nearly every performance by women desperate to share their own anxieties and experiences of sexual violence, began working with Willa Shalit to organize a weekend centered around performances of the Monologues and other, similar works nationwide to raise money to benefit female victims of abuse and rape and to pursue an end to those phenomena. Twelve years later the Vagina Monologues and V-Day are still going strong, and have actually grown since their birth – the Monologues have added new sections over the years to reflect the developing concerns of women, and V-Day has spread out of New York to encompass not only the United States but the whole world.

While I knew about the Vagina Monologues before last weekend, I didn’t know about V-Day, which was tragic because it was exactly what I needed. I think it was what even more women needed, too. Valentine’s Day might be something that everybody cringes and mopes over, but a movement that seeks to co-opt the date in pursuit of social justice and freedom of women from violence? If you can’t get a little excited about that then I don’t really know what to say. Some people apparently criticize V-Day for being misandrist, or for trying to remind people of gender and sex-based injustice at a time when the sexes are supposed to be coming together in love, but I don’t think they get the point. Or maybe they’re the people who’ve never had trouble getting dates in February.

Anyway, back to the show! It started with three of the performers coming out to tell us a little about vaginas; namely, what they’re called all over this great nation of ours. This checklist got everyone laughing, and I think that might be part of the purpose of the show, to take us all back to that simple, childish state where people’s bodies simply existed, some were different from others, and we all had a good-natured giggle over how funny some of the words were before getting back to the important business of torturing our parents.

One of the monologues was a newer addition written by Eve Ensler about her witnessing the birth of her grandchild. It was remarkable to me for the same reason I imagine the experience it was based on was remarkable to her: I forgot that women can do that, and even when I think about it now the logistical and mechanical concerns are so great that I get dizzy. The whole process really is miraculous.

The monologues reflected the experiences of real women with their sexuality and their bodies, so while many of them tempered their grievances with humor, wit and whimsy some of them showed, just like the lives of many women in the world today, a history of the most gut-wrenching sorts of tragedy or oppression without much relief to speak of. There was the story of the Bosnian girl who fell victim to the systematic rape of the women in her country as a tactic of war, whose words still make my hands shake with grief. There was the Congolese girl who told the audience, through the frame of her two years as a sex slave, the eight rules necessary to survive such an ordeal. There was the story of the woman in the burqa, which is of course at the center a very complicated debate, but which reminded us that however we might feel about Islam and the dress and behaviors that sometimes follow from it, it is a religious choice and we are a nation that prides itself on religious tolerance. The problem, we were told, is that for a great many women the burqa and things like it are not a choice, and if the monologue was any indication of reality under those circumstances then my heart goes out to those women.

Look, the piece is controversial. It’s not politically correct. And I assume
people are going to have responses to it. I interviewed women, and I told
their stories. I didn’t make them up. People are going to have problems with
people’s stories.

For the record, I agree with Eve. Really you should see the show anyway, but that’s neither here nor there.

I still didn’t have a date for Valentine’s Day, but you know what? Who cares! I got to take part, even if it was a tiny little inconsequential part, in an even better V-letter event that made me happier than I’ve ever been on Valentine’s Day, even with a date. I think I’ve found my February holiday of choice from now on!

*I feel like every boss I ever hated just typing those words out.

THE VAGINA LINKS

Random House's Vagina Monologues Page
VDay.org

La Amiga

2010-02-09T11:38:00.008-05:00

The program I am going to tell you about has recently been nominated to receive a "People's Choice Award" by WTCI's Be More Awards. To vote for Partnership please go to this link and vote for them for the People’s Choice Award! Read on to learn more.

Imagine for a moment that you are an immigrant in another country, a stranger in a strange land. You arrive, perhaps in the company of the man you married back home or perhaps to live with your new native husband. You’re probably poor, but your husband might have money. You don’t know anyone in this new place except your husband and possibly his family, and you don’t speak or understand a word of the language. For all intents and purposes, you are deaf and mute and invisible to everyone but your husband in this new place, utterly dependent on him with nowhere else to go, no-one else to turn to, and no way to communicate even if you did.

You might have married a good man, in which case you will be encouraged to learn the language of your new home, to make friends, to drive or find work if that is what you choose. He will make sure that your immigration is certified as soon as possible so that you are both citizens by law. Your children will go to school and grow up happy in your new life. Things don’t always work out this way though, and you didn’t marry a good man. Perhaps you come from a culture that arranges marriages or you simply had to cling to this man out of poverty or fear of trying to survive on your own, but he is anything but good. He hits you. He screams. He threatens, terrorizes, and demeans. He rapes you. If he is a legal citizen of your new home himself, he tells you that he could have you put in prison or deported if you make him angry or deny him anything he wants. If you have a child he might repeat all of these abuses on the child on top of promising that if you cross him or defy him at all he will make sure you and your child are separated forever. You are utterly alone, because he has done everything he could to keep your immigration status in limbo, he has isolated you so that you can’t learn the language of your new home, he has instilled a fear of everyone who could help you in your heart and, worst of all, depending on the culture you come from you might not even recognize that, at least in your new home, the things this man is doing to you are illegal and reprehensible.

There are resources and shelters out there for women in this situation, but they’re much more difficult to access; the already crippling obstacles that keep native women from reaching out for aid in abusive situations are compounded by language, cultural, and perceived legal barriers. But there is hope, in the form of La Amiga and the FVSS. La Amiga is an initiative within the Partnership to provide better, more thorough services for immigrant and non-English speaking women suffering from abuse, and since it began two years ago it has improved the lives of over 100 women who otherwise would have fallen through the cracks. The program received funding from the Community Foundation of Greater Chattanooga, and for that we thank them.

The services La Amiga provides seem like common sense when you think about them. At the core, all La Amiga really does is act as a combination of translator and caseworker for non-English speaking and especially Latina victims, but there is really more to it than that. She is familiar with the culture of the women she speaks with as much as she is with their language, and this does wonders when it comes to helping them. In addition, she has done things like put out Partnership fliers in Spanish so that Latinas can actually understand what is written on the ads and know how to get help*, created a video in Spanish that carefully walks women through the process of arriving at a shelter if they come at night or during another time when La Amiga or a translator isn’t present, and she makes sure that immigrant women trying to escape from abusive relationships understand that their husbands’ threats of deportation and separation from their children are not true as well as providing them with the resources to achieve full citizenship.

All of this appears to have worked. Before La Amiga nine out of every ten English speaking women who came to a shelter remained and made the transition to independence, whereas fewer than five in ten Spanish-speaking women did the same. Only seventeen Latinas sought any help at all in Shelters in 2007-2008. In 2008-2009 however, more than one hundred Latinas and other non-English speaking women (and don’t be fooled, she is as much a Chingu or a Mitr as she is una Amiga) sought assistance and nearly eighty-six percent of those women didn’t return to their abusers.

La Amiga’s name is Lydia Salva, and I sat down to speak with her recently about her work with the Partnership. Ms. Salva is an amazing, vivacious woman who has seen more of the world than most of us ever will. She is also remarkably humble for someone who has done so much to help so many people, but she explained to me that she doesn’t really do as much of the work as you might think. All she does for the women she helps is provide support and resources for them to use.

“The mission of the Partnership is, ‘Empowering people to build better lives,’ and I like that,” she said. “I think that’s good. The Partnership is an amazing team. They’re always training you, and they empower you to empower others.”

She told me a lot about the special concerns and threats facing immigrant women and especially Latinas that make them so vulnerable. “Statistically, the Latin American woman is the most abused woman in the United States, whether she’s married to an American or she’s married to a Latino,” she said. “Those three countries that have the highest rates of domestic violence are right here in Hamilton County.” The statistics back this up: the World Health Organization reports that nearly one in two women in Mexico, Guatemala and Honduras is a victim of domestic violence and that the most abused of all foreigners living in the U.S. are Latinas born abroad. Lydia was adamant, however, that domestic violence and abuse can’t be laid at the feet of race or culture or nationality and used as a scapegoat. “Domestic violence is not limited to a culture to a language or to a social status. It’s the same, and the pain is just as bad.” She mused that all sorts of things could contribute to the higher rates of violence in Latin America, from Catholic veneration of Mary encouraging women to suffer silently with dignity as part and parcel to motherhood to the pretty much constant oppression and abuse of native peoples and those descended from natives by Spanish colonists and their white descendants. She did mention that a lot of abuse is tied to unemployment and joblessness and that as we see unemployment rise in the U.S. we are seeing a rise in domestic abuse as well. “It’s not an excuse. None of this excuses it, but they are explanations,” she said.

I asked her about the men who do the abusing, about what she thinks feeds into it and what, if anything, can be done to help teach them to break the cycle of violence themselves. “A lot of these guys that are abusing, they were probably victims themselves. They saw their mom, their grandmother get beaten and they never got help. So, I’m not excusing it but I’m also looking at that. Hopefully we can help them. You have to somehow educate the woman but also educate men,” she said. “One day, when I was doing a presentation, there was a group of about fifty and there were only like ten women and most of these were Guatemalans. So, when I was talking about domestic violence some of these guys, their eyes just got bigger and bigger when I explained it to them. And I remember I asked these guys, ‘Imagine you are a kid, and your daddy is beating your mom. What do you feel? What did you feel if that did happen to you? Did you feel pain? What was going through your heart?’ And I said to open your eyes, and in a lot of these guys I saw some tears. And I said, ‘Imagine what your children are feeling’ and a lot of them bowed their heads. I said, ‘If there was a program that could offer to show you how to handle your anger would you go?’, and so many of their heads nodded. A lot of these guys, they know something’s wrong, but they don’t know how to handle it. No one has told them how to, or what to do.”

After we had talked for a few minutes about her work and her experiences, Lydia introduced me to three of the women she has helped. Their names have been changed for their safety and privacy, but they were more than happy to speak with me about their experiences with La Amiga and the Partnership.

The first person I sat down with, who we’ll call Emerald, was a quiet Asian woman who apologized for her English frequently as we spoke. All three of the women apologized for their English this way, but I assured each of them as best I could that there was no need. I’ve been led to believe that English is one of the more difficult of the commonly studied languages to learn, and none of these women had even been studying it for more than three years yet were conversational. Emerald’s story from before she began her work with the Partnership can be found

here as well as a little bit on her life afterward, but the focus of my talks with each of these women was their lives now, what they are doing to reach independence and wholeness, and I think that falls more in line with the goals of the Partnership and its shelters than a preoccupation with the way they were victimized - these are survivors, not victims.

So what has Emerald been up to? She has learned enough English to get by in day to day life. She has recently gotten her Nurse’s Assistant Certification, which was a very big deal for her since she was told by her teacher not to take the test at all because of her English. She, like the other two women, had come too far and done too much to be held back by something so trivial however, and she not only took the test but was one of only seven out of a group of fourteen to pass it. She has a fourteen year old daughter who is not only enrolled in my old high school, but who makes better grades there than I ever did. She is also Sylvia’s longest-running case – her citizenship is going to come through soon, she is working as a nurse’s assistant, and what she wants more than ever now is to go back to school to be a nurse so that she can do even more to help others.

The next person I spoke with was an Indian woman we’ll call Shelly. Shelly has only been in America for a year and has only been with the Partnership for 85 days out of that, but from what I saw her life is in the process of pulling a complete 180. Her English wasn’t fantastic but it was enough to understand one another most of the time if we spoke carefully, and it’s important to remember that she has reached this level of mastery after only three months! Shelly reminded me, more than anything else, of Virginia Woolf. I don’t think she’s a writer, but a lot of what she said centered on how amazing it was to have a place of her own, where she can make her own decisions about her life and that of her son, and that this is something she has never had before. She also told me that she is learning to drive, which is another amazing experience for her because before she came to the Partnership she didn’t know how to use buses or even how to read signs to get from place to place on foot and, since Hindi isn’t nearly as common a language in America as Spanish, she didn’t even have the resources of translators or an immigrant community to help her – she was mute and paralyzed without her husband, but now she is learning to speak and to move. “I stay in home, you know? And I don’t know anything – how I go, how I speak, how I go on the bus, but in 3 months I learn too much about this,” she said.

She also echoed what Lydia told me about how many women, whether it’s because they’ve never known a life that wasn’t abusive or because they come from a more strictly patriarchal culture, simply aren’t cognizant that their situations are abusive or wrong. “In our culture, I’m talking about only Indian people, they didn’t respect women this much. I learned here that women deserve respect, because she is everything, you know? She can do everything as a mother, wife, sister, and what men can do also.”

The thing that struck me most about my talk with her, and what has informed my thoughts on all the other women, was when I asked her about her experience as a Hindi speaker alone in America. She said the quote above about being alone in the home, and when I asked her what it was like to now know English she thought for a moment.

“I can speak now,” she said finally.

The final person I spoke with was a woman from El Salvador who we’ll call Emily. The first thing you notice about Emily is her ready smile and her sense of humor, two things Sylvia tells me she has only recently reclaimed. Like many of the Hispanic women the Partnership has helped since La Amiga began, what Emily told me about her experience had less to do with shelter and material assistance, and much more to do with advice and education. What the Partnership taught her, she told me, was how to spot a person who would be abusive to her, what to look out for. They taught her that she deserves better than a man who will beat her and her daughter does as well, and she has learned to make better choices in who she wants to be and in the people she chooses to be with.

Since Lydia had been so humble for most of the hour I tried to get some praise from Emily. “She doesn’t really want to brag, Emily, so brag for her if you could,” I said. They both laughed and exchanged a few words in Spanish, and then Emily took a moment to find the correct words before settling finally on something simple.

“She helps,” Emily said.

Honestly, I couldn’t think of a better way to describe or to compliment Lydia and the rest of the Partnership. They help.

*Without being able to understand the writing, a lot of fliers and ads for women’s shelters honestly look like ads for depression medication.

To show your appreciation for the Partnership and the work of La Amiga, please go to this link and vote for them for the People’s Choice Award!

I Spent All Morning Surrounded by Police Officers

2010-02-02T10:17:00.006-05:00

It’s sometimes difficult for me to think of police officers as heroes. Perhaps this is due to the media I’ve grown up with, where there is a Wire or Shield for every Law & Order or Castle on television and a story of corruption and brutality for every report of valor and courage in the news. Perhaps the feeling just goes hand-in-hand with being young, liberal and idealistic, and some of you are sagely clucking your tongues right now as you remember your own youthful misconceptions. Whatever the cause for this outlook, it was put to the test last Monday morning when I sat in on a domestic violence training course sponsored by the Partnership in cooperation with the Chattanooga Police Department.

I’m not sure what I expected, my only previous real life experience with the police amounting to traffic tickets and stern looks discouraging shoplifting* when I was a teenager. Whatever I actually expected, the reality of police officers turned out to be much more pedestrian. Officers from every department in the region filtered in as 9:00 rolled around, some in uniform and some in street clothes, some carrying a weapon and some unarmed, some old and some young, male and female, black white and Hispanic, some in fighting trim and some…well, still in much better shape than me. Before class started they sat around talking about, well, exactly the sorts of things everyone talks about with their coworkers: how much sleep newborns were costing them, what movies they’d seen, how a weekend trip had gone. It was almost as if – and I know this is shocking - they were regular people doing a job and trying to get by, just like you and me.

I was still dubious of course, but the seed of doubt had been planted. Then the class started and the first order of business was for everyone to introduce themselves and say a little bit about why they were there and what their experience with domestic abuse was. There were one or two answers that made me cringe and a handful of admissions that an officer was only there because they had to be, but they were outweighed by the heartfelt responses that – and here’s what finally started to turn me – many of these officers felt frustrated that there was nothing they could do to help the women and the small handful of men they encountered in domestic violence cases, often over and over, besides arresting an abusive spouse or intimate partner who would only later be let go and allowed to redouble his abuse once he got back home. I had always imagined the police the same way a teenager thinks of his parents – here were people whose only goal in life was to punish people every chance they got, for no reason other than that it was fun. The realization that none of them were rabid authoritarian fascists and that many if not most of them were just as concerned with protecting the innocent as punishing the guilty was about as shocking as finally realizing that my parents no more enjoyed grounding me than I enjoyed being grounded. It humanized them and gave me a sense of respect that had been missing before.

Sadly though, a desire to help and an understanding of how to do so, especially without also causing harm, are not the same thing, which is why Jack Parks and the Partnership were involved. There was actually a dedicated domestic violence task force in Tennessee between 1996 and 2000 that took the annual domestic violence related murder rate down from the twenties to the low single digits for its entire run before sadly running out of funding and the Partnership, the Police Department and the state of Tennessee want to try and repeat that success. In fact Chris Chambers, one of the veteran officers of the original task force, was the one teaching the class. The Partnership’s role in all this is providing the officers with a framework for learning and access to the sort of resources and services they can use to help victims and survivors of abuse, as well as writing and overseeing the grant to make sure that a lack of funding doesn’t stop lives from being saved later on this time.

But what did they actually cover in the class? I was only there for one morning out of the whole week of speeches from survivors of domestic abuse, role-playing and tests, mind you, but in the span of just a few hours I was exposed to a lot. First of all, it turns out that I’m not the only person who’s had trouble trusting the police, and that for all their good intentions some of this mistrust on the part of domestic violence victims is justified. Apparently it’s not uncommon for an officer to arrest the victim of domestic abuse as well as the abuser, usually because the victim is hysterical and uncooperative when they arrive compared to the abuser, who – as you can read about in the links below – is often such a consummate manipulator or bully that he is calm and composed by that time, granting him an air of legitimacy that throws the victim in a bad light. The officers in class defended this behavior at first, mostly on the grounds that the victims often seemed to pose a danger to themselves or got in the way of arresting the abuser. When Officer Chambers told them that arresting the victim, who will then be reluctant to contact the police again, increases that person’s odds of being murdered by their abuser by something like 75%, more than a few eyes went wide and no-one else spoke up.

Another issue of police mistrust, and one I was genuinely surprised was brought up, had to do with domestic abuse in same-sex relationships. Officer Chambers made a point to mention that not only does this abuse happen and make sure it was treated with the respect it deserved, he also drove home that when it does happen, whether it’s in a lesbian or gay couple, the rates of serious injury and murder are much higher. He didn’t have an answer when one officer asked why, but I think this quote from aardvark.org sheds some light on the issue:

Facing a system which is often oppressive and hostile towards those who identify as anything other than "straight", those involved in same-gender battering frequently report being afraid of revealing their sexual orientation or the nature of their relationship. Additionally, even those who attempt to report violence in their alterative relationship run into obstacles. Police officers, prosecutors, judges and others to whom a GLBT victim may turn to for help may have difficulty in providing the same level of service as to a heterosexual victim. Not only might personal attitudes towards the GLBT community come into play, but these providers may have inadequate levels of experience and training to work with GLBT victims and flimsy or non-existant laws to enforce on behalf of the victim.

It’s sad but true that we have a long way to go when it comes to protecting every member of our society equally, but the effort is still being made by good people of all political stripes, and I think that’s really all we can ask for now. The officers seemed to take the information seriously, which I hope speaks to their interactions with GLBT individuals in our community.

Racial and economic demographics were also brought up, and the information was startling – it turns out that one of the most underreported groups victimized by domestic abuse, and by extension one of the most vulnerable, is upper-middle class and professional women, since they often feel they have more to lose in leaving their abusers and those same abusers have more resources, social and economic, to bring to bear in keeping their victims silent, helpless and compliant. This came as a potent reminder that abuse and victimization of women pays only lip service to race, creed, nationality and class.

One of the important topics that tied back specifically into the Partnership was making sure that the officers know about and know how to utilize the resources and programs the Partnership provides. The most frequently mentioned frustrations in the classroom were that the officers had no real power besides arrest over the fates of victims in their cases and that even when they did get someone help they felt cut off from them, even though the victim is often still in danger if their abuser is released from custody; Sadly, one of the more common ways for an abuser to stay out of prison is for their victim to refuse to testify in court, either from embarrassment or a very understandable sense of fear. For the first complaint, it was made clear to the officers that not only is their assistance encouraged, but that a referral from a law enforcement officer to the Partnership is always taken seriously and dealt with immediately. As to the second complaint, they were assured that not only will the Partnership help keep them in touch with the people they’re trying to protect, but that the digital cameras they were provided as part of the class would prove to be potent tools for gathering evidence at the scene of the crime while it was still fresh, which would prove vital to keeping a dangerous abuser away from his victim even if the victim doesn’t testify in court.

Finally, Officer Chambers covered more about domestic abuse than just violence. He reminded everyone that it's only in the last few years that forced sex within marriage has been classified as rape, and that sexual assault and forced pregnancy are still often used as a means of controlling a victim. He also discussed psychological, emotional, and financial abuse, none of which are things I imagine the officers could help with directly, but knowledge of which will help them know what to look for when they're called as well as what evidence to gather for when a case comes to court.

So how has my opinion of the police changed after sitting in on this class? I still don’t think of them as heroes, really, but it’s probably better just to know that they’re regular people with a desire to do good and protect people who can’t protect themselves. All other things aside though, if I had to choose anyone to protect the women (and some of the men) in my life if, God forbid, they’re ever in an abusive relationship, I can’t think of anyone I would welcome more than the police and the Partnership.

*I never shoplifted, I just looked like I would have so I guess I don’t blame them.

Note: If you are currently in a relationship which you feel is unsafe or abusive, please be aware that there is no way to safely browse a computer if someone is dedicated to invading your privacy or monitoring your actions. This includes text messaging, e-mail, and instant messaging. If you feel you are in imminent danger or would be if your spouse or significant other discovered you researching this topic or reaching out for help, please go to the police, one of the Partnership's shelters, a computer at the library or a school, or even just a friend or relative’s house before you do anything else. You have options, you don’t have to deal with it alone, you DO NOT have to tolerate any kind of abuse one moment longer than you already have. Please be safe.

Important Domestic Abuse Links:
The Partnership's Sexual Assault Crisis and Resource Center
The Partnership's Family Violence Center
The Partnership's Emergency Shelter for Families
Aardvarc.org: A collection of important information and resources provided by survivors of relationship and domestic abuse and violance.
Nnedv.org: A guide on how to safely use the internet and computers if you are currently in an abusive relationship.
Helpguide.org: An article on the signs that you are in an abusive relationship or that someone you know is trapped in an abusive situation.

The Elderly and Disabled Victims Program

2010-01-26T10:52:00.005-05:00

Welcome back! This week we’re going to take a look at the Elderly and Disabled Victims Program, which we should all care about. Why, you ask? I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but (unless you already are, in which case I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know) one day, barring tragedy, you are going to be old. Gasp, right? It’s not a bad thing, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of, but many of us seem to operate under the illusion that it won’t happen to us – it will, I assure you, and I don’t know about anyone else but when I’m old I want to be well taken care of, treated with dignity and generally free from abuse. I imagine we all do once we admit that we aren’t immune to time, which is why it’s so important that we make sure our elders are taken care of now, and the Elderly and Disabled Victims Program is the Partnership’s effort to do exactly that.

The elderly and disabled are some of the most vulnerable people in any society. Every day, elderly and disabled members of our community are deprived of some or all of the basic conditions of human dignity, suffering from sexual and physical assault, humiliation, intimidation, isolation, and financial exploitation. The Elderly and Disabled Victims Program has four services that deal with the different facets of this problem.

• Geriatrics takes and works with referrals from the community for elderly people in need of assistance.
• Service Coordinators work closely with public housing.
• Ombudsmen are volunteers who go into assisted living centers and nursing homes to advocate for the residents there.
• VOCA, or Victims of Crime and Abuse, provides free support and recovery services for disabled people between 18 and 59 and elderly people over the age of 60 who are in crisis or recovering from abuse. A lot of their work consists of keeping the people they work with independent if at all possible.

The services provided by this program include:

• Crisis intervention/emergency services
• Comprehensive assessment
• Counseling and guidance
• Case management
• Referrals for community assistance
• Advocacy and intervention
• Court related services
• Safety planning
• Public education

These services are vital to elderly and disabled people recovering from or currently involved in the various forms of abuse I’ll cover below, but they can’t or won’t usually pursue them for themselves, which is why referrals from the community are so important. If you know an elderly or disabled person who you think is suffering from abuse but aren’t sure about referring them, please remember that not only are referrals anonymous upon request, but all of the services the Partnership offers are entirely optional – the dignity and independence of people in need comes before anything else.

You can’t really make a referral if you don’t know what abuse is, and it’s sometimes more complex or subtle than you’d think, so what constitutes abuse with regard to the elderly and disabled? There are six types of abuse to look out for: physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, neglect or abandonment, financial exploitation, and healthcare fraud. The names explain themselves, really, but if you want to learn more about what plays into each of these types you can go to the links below to find out in more detail. It’s important to remember that, especially when dealing with elderly or disabled people who are dependent on others for care, things that would not normally seem abusive absolutely can be, so never be afraid to speak up if something seems strange!

The links below also list signs to look out for with each type of abuse, but in speaking with one of the Program’s VOCA workers I learned a few other important symptoms as well as some complications I might not have thought of otherwise. For example, most sources mention that bruises, especially bilateral bruising on the arms can indicate physical abuse. The same bruises could also be caused by an isolated fall, but if there is a series of bruises in different stages of healing near the same area it’s almost certainly a sign of repeated intentional injury. Also, bruising on the thighs can indicate sexual assault, which is much simpler to look for as a lay person than the physical symptoms listed in the links, as well as less invasive for the elder or disabled person.

It’s important to note that most abuse and exploitation doesn’t take place in nursing homes or other care facilities – it takes place in the homes of the elderly or disabled person or the homes of the individuals caring for them, usually family. This doesn’t make much sense until you realize that a lot of abuse isn’t intentional and malicious, at least not at first – it’s caused by burnout on the part of the caregiver. If you are taking care of an elderly or disabled person, please be aware that your mental and emotional health is vital. If you allow yourself to be overcome by stress, anger or depression it could be disastrous for your elderly or disabled loved one. Don’t worry though, because you’re not alone! There are agencies that can provide respite care that anyone taking care of an elderly or disabled person should look into. There is also a agency and support group specifically for alzheimers that could help in the city, which is important since alzheimers sufferers can be especially taxing on their caregivers. It is also vital that the caregiver do as much to avoid isolation in themselves as it is to make sure the elderly person is not isolated – if your entire life revolves around the person in your care, you will start to resent them eventually.

The Partnership for Families, Children and Adults doesn’t provide all the services an abused elderly or disabled person might need. The Partnership’s help is only voluntary and even then only serves to stabilize the victims, aid their recovery, preserve their independence, and maintain a decent quality of life. The Partnership does, however, work with other services in the area, including the police, Adult Protective Services, public housing, and United Way's 211, all of whom refer victims to the Partnership in addition to providing what aid they can. More help is always needed though, which is why your assistance (yes, yours) is so important!

(And, on the off chance that you're qualified for the position, there is currently a two year waiting list in geratrics due to a shortage of caseworkers. I can't think of many nobler pursuits!)

Important Links:
The 211 service
Adult Protective Services
Respite Care
Support for Alzheimers caregivers
Numerous support resources for caregivers
Information from the APA on elder abuse
More information on elder abuse
MORE information on elder abuse!
An article on the abuse of disabled people

Introduction!

2010-01-26T10:46:00.003-05:00

We all deserve dignity and agency in our own lives. We all deserve freedom from abuse and exploitation. These things go without saying (at least they should) but, sadly, this ideal doesn’t reflect many people’s daily realities. Thankfully there are groups like the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults in the world; it is the job of these amazing people to step in and help the helpless as well as try to affect the sorts of changes that keep people from needing help in the first place. An organization like the Partnership isn’t at its most effective unless it has the cooperation of the community it works in though, and people’s attention and awareness are some of their most potent resources.

That’s where I come in! My name is Travis, and I’m lucky enough to have snagged an internship with this amazing organization. When they told me they had a spot open for a writer I was more than a little surprised but apparently - contrary to what all my engineering friends have led me to believe - you can actually do something useful as an English major. In this case, I’ll be shining a spotlight on one of the Partnership’s programs every week so that you out there can appreciate the amazing work these people do every day. I’ve only been here for two weeks so far and I can already promise that you have no idea how much the Partnership actually does or how amazing it is.

Check back regularly though and you might start to get an idea!

2009-08-06T18:24:00.001-04:00

Join us on Facebook!

Partnership for Families, Children, and Adults on Facebook

Donations Needed for Family Violence Shelter

2009-07-09T10:45:00.002-04:00

We need your help! The Partnership’s Family Violence Shelter is currently at full capacity and more than half of these clients are children. We are in need of canned soups that children would like (chicken noodle, vegetable alphabet, etc.), as well as, toiletry and personal items for both women and children, such as, toilet paper, hand soap, combs, etc. Your in-kind donations can be dropped off at 300 East 8th Street at any time. If you would like to make a financial contribution, as little as $76 covers one night of shelter. Financial contributions to the shelter can be sent to 1800 McCallie Avenue Chattanooga, TN 37404, or click here to make an online contribution https://secure.qgiv.com/cps_donors/?key=pfca&restrict=Crisis+and+Emergency+Services. We appreciate your support for these families affected by domestic violence. For more information contact Holly Ashley at 423-697-3829 or email hashley@partnershipfca.com.

New Playground for Crisis Center!

2009-07-02T15:57:00.003-04:00

The Partnership’s new playground for the Crisis Resource Center is officially open! Volunteers and staff joined us Tuesday night for an open house and ribbon cutting to celebrate the completion of the playground installation. Chattanooga Hamilton County Medical Alliance president, Melissa Portera was accompanied by Alliance members Carrie Fowler, Amy Sowell, and Milli Yium as we thanked them for the $15,000 grant which made the installation possible. Several volunteers from Northwest Georgia Bank attended with their children to see how all their hard work paid off.

Dancing with the Stars Winners Announced!

2009-06-23T11:54:00.002-04:00

As one of our dancers said, "Oh, What a Night"! Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga was a great success, raising over $29,000 in much needed funds to support the Partnership's mission of empowering people to build better lives.

Now for the winners!!

For the Fan Favorite Award - the winner was.....ALISON LEBOVITZ!
Alison raised $4,633 from friends, family, and fans supporting her in this event. Thank you Alison!! Our other wonderful dancers raised:

Dr. Carolyn Thompson - $2,860
Linda Mosley - $2,580
Jason Taylor - $995
George Quick - $810
Renee LaSalle - $645

Thank you to all of our dancers and donors ! In addition to these funds, an anonymous donor has agreed to match every dollar raised, over last year's total of $10,050. Thanks to all of these generous supporters, The Fan Favorite Award contest raised a total of $15,023!!

For the Dancing Champion Award - the winner was.......JASON TAYLOR!!

Jason danced a cha-cha to MC Hammer's "Can't Touch this" and brought down the house. Complete with 1980's era costuming and cool gold shades, Jason's performance received perfect 10's from all five of our judges! He also received a total of 1,581 votes from fans attending the event. Jason and his Fred Astaire partner, Ashley Cuticchia, took home the mirror ball trophies on Saturday!

In second place, also with perfect 10's, and with 803 votes, was Alison Lebovitz and her cha-cha to "Low". This was also a crowd pleaser and an unforgettable performance. Other show-stopping performances included Linda Mosley dancing a fast swing to Footloose, Renee Lasalle with a Tango to "Let's Make Love", George Quick's fox trot to "It's My Life", and Carolyn Thompson's salsa to Ricky Martin.

We thank all the guests for supporting our dancers, and all of our sponsors, including presenting sponsor First Tennessee, for making the evening possible.

Fan Favorite Voting Ending at 5:00!!!

2009-06-19T15:00:00.004-04:00

We would like to thank all of those who have participated in the Fan Favorite voting for the Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga Event. The totals are adding up and the the race has been very close. We will no longer update the voting totals until after the annoucement of the Fan Favorite winner at the event. If you have not voted for your favorite dancer and would like to do so please visit http://www.dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com/. You have until 5 p.m. today! Remember the race is very close and every vote helps your favorite dancer!

Carolyn Thompson Jumps in to Compete for the #1 Spot!

2009-06-16T10:21:00.003-04:00

Everyone has steadily gained more money this month. However, Carolyn Thompson, who had $35 at the beginning of the month, leaped forward with $2,235 and is now fighting for the top position with Alison Lebovitz and Linda Mosley. Who will be the final winner? Will there be another Carolyn Thompson before the event is over? Find out this Saturday at Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga. (Tickets are already sold out but you can still follow the stars' progress after the event be checking out our blog)

The standings in Fan Favorite Voting are as follows:

#1 Alison Lebovitz $3,177.00

#2 Linda Mosley $2,480.00

#3 Carolyn Thompson $2,235

#4 George Quick $625.00

#5 Jason Taylor $300.00

#6 Renee Lasalle $185.oo

2009-06-11T11:21:00.004-04:00

If it takes a village to raise a child, it certainly took a village to raise a playground on a hot Saturday in May! Thanks to a generous grant from the Chattanooga Medical Alliance, the Partnership’s Family Violence Shelter received a new playground this spring. Countless volunteers from EPB, Earthworks, Habitat for Humanity of Chattanooga, Northwest Georgia Bank, Brainerd Baptist Church, Christ United Methodist Church and the community assembled an entire playground and installed it! Now our families with children have an outdoor area to play – THANK YOU!

EPB took time to remove old playground equipment at the Partnership, in preparation of a new unit to be installed for children living in our Family Violence Shelter

Our ‘village’ of volunteers from Northwest Georgia Bank, Brainerd Baptist Church, Christ United Methodist Church, and the community. Thanks for the new playground!

This group of ladies from Northwest Georgia Bank helped assemble an entire playground for children in the Partnership’s Family Violence Shelter. Thanks for volunteering!

It was all volunteer hands on deck to remove old stone from the playground construction site.

Northwest Georgia Bank volunteer finds himself in a tight, but shady, spot while constructing the Family Violence Shelter’s new playground.

"We Speak"

2009-06-09T14:42:00.005-04:00

Local artist Frances McDonald and friends invited all of Chattanooga to the Ross Hotel for the grand reveal of Mark Making’s first community project, on May 29^th. Several of the participating youth from the Partnership showed up to present their individual “I_____” statements. The Partnerships pays special thanks to all involved in the project. It was a truly unique experience for our youth, creating a truly unique piece of community art for all to enjoy!

Partnership youth, Arileyea, posing with Chattanooga Mayor, Ron Littlefield at the Mark Making project reveal at Ross Hotel.

Two Partnership youth celebrate the Grand Reveal of their “I_____” statements at the Mark Making project at the Ross Hotel.

Partnership CEO, Sandra Hollett and Partnership Board Chair, Dr. Deborah Arfken meet youth who participated in the Mark Making art project at the Ross Hotel

Alsion Lebovitz Jumps Ahead!

2009-06-03T11:27:00.003-04:00

Alison Lebovitz has passed Linda Mosley in Fan Favorite voting for the Dancing With the Stars Chattanooga Event making her the current top fav. Also, George Quick has passed Jason Taylor for the 3rd positon. The Dancer that raises the largest amount of fan voting money will take home the Fan Favorite Award. You can vote for your favorite star at www.dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com/. Also remember to check the website to see Fan Favorite totals that will be updated daily.

The standings in Fan Favorite Voting are as follows:

#1 Alison Lebovitz $2713.00

#2 Linda Mosley $2430.00

#3 George Quick $260.00

#4 Jason Taylor $175.00

#5 Carolyn Thompson $ 35.00

#6 Renee Lasalle $10.oo

"We Speak"

2009-05-28T10:16:00.003-04:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6u664hXQhjI

“We Speak,” a project by Mark Making in 2009 is a series of 50 paintings created by 50 teens. When hung together, they create a building which “speaks” words of empowerment. Each teen was asked to think of a phrase “I ______” which most represented what they would express to an audience of all Chattanooga and its visitors. Using mirrors, each teen then drew and painted their mouth, articulating their word.

Sponsors of the project include the Ross Hotel owner, Selma Cash Paty, Paragon Printing who supplied the vinyl canvases, and Wise Construction who installed the work. Art teacher facilitators include Carla Guerra, Lawrence Mathis, Frances McDonald, John McLeod, Jas Milam and Dennis Palmer. Teen artists are from the Partnership of Families, Children and Adults, the Chambliss Home and CADAS.

“We Speak” is funded by Selma Cash Paty and Mark Making, a new non-profit which seeks to enhance our community through the creation of public art projects.

Ross Hotel Project Pics

2009-05-20T14:00:00.004-04:00

Local artist Frances McDonald has been working one-on-one for weeks with local Chattanooga youth to create these unique "I" statements, now posted on the old Ross Hotel on Georgia Avenue. A few youth from the Partnership's group homes participated in this exciting project, creating their own "I" statement and assisting with the artwork. Take a drive by the old hotel and check out these creative pieces!

Fan Favorites: Linda Mosley Takes the Lead

2009-05-12T16:52:00.003-04:00

Linda Mosley has taken a large and early lead in the Fan Favorite voting for the Dancing With the Stars Chattanooga Event. The Dancer raises the largest amount of fan voting money will take home the Fan Favorite Award. You can vote for your favorite star at www.dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com/. Also remember to check the website to see Fan Favorite totals that will be updated daily.

The standings in Fan Favorite Voting are as follows:

#1 Linda Mosley $1805.00

#2 Alison Lebovitz $425.00

#3 Jason Taylor $125.00

#4 George Quick $50.00

#5/6 Renee LaSalle, Carolyn Thompson $0.00

Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga UPDATE

2009-05-08T14:49:00.004-04:00

Dancing with the Stars Chattanooga is sure to be this year's most electric fundraising event! With just over 6 weeks to go until the big night on June 20th, VIP tickets are already sold out - with limited table seating left and fewer than 40 general admission seats. If you plan to attend, buy your tickets fast at http://www.dancingwiththestarschattanooga.com/.

You can also visit the website above to vote for your favorite Chattanooga Star to win the Fan Favorite Award, which will be presented to the dancer raising the most votes. Our Chattanooga Stars are: Alison Lebovitz, Jason Taylor, Dr. Carolyn Thompson, George Quick, Renee LaSalle, and Linda Mosley. They are all halfway through their practice sessions and are preparing uniquely entertaining performances. Who knew they could dance?

We will also have video of our Stars available very soon so we can really see how far they've come event night!

Special thanks go out to our presenting sponsor, First Tennessee, for making this evening possible. Special thanks also to the instructors at Fred Astaire Dance Studio, the official dance instructors to Dancing with Stars! And speaking of "official" Dancing with the Stars connections - Tony Dovolani and his professional dance partner Elena Grinenko will be joining our event for exciting exhibition dances! Tony and Elena have both appeared on the TV show, and Tony is dancing again this season and doing very well. Check him out on ABC!

2009-03-09T10:53:00.002-04:00

It never fails. Each year in Chattanooga when the daffodils start blooming, so do the yard sale signs. This past weekend was especially bountiful due to the warm weather. I know I drove past half a dozen signs between East Brainerd and Hixson on Saturday. And everyone loves a yard sale, right? Especially when you can save a few bucks and score an antique book or a great piece of furniture.

Well, the Partnership has a sale for you. A garage sale in fact. We will open our garage doors to the shopping public on Saturday, April 4th at our 1800 McCallie Avenue office. There are childrens items, furniture, clothing, books, home decor and household goods...even antiques. Our prices will be hard to beat, and our service unmatched as smiling Partnership staff greet you.

Not only will you get a good deal, but our Homemaker Services will benefit from the proceeds. The dollar you pay for a child's sundress will help provide non-medical, personal assitance to an elderly neighbor who is just trying to live independently in their own home.

We are even accepting your donations of gently used items to sale at the event. Just call (423) 697-3824 to make an appointment and drop off your items.

We hope to see you in April!

Top 10 Reasons to Run in the Scenic City Charity Challenge 09

2009-01-29T15:47:00.002-05:00

The Partnership is one of eight charities participating in the Scenic City Charity Challenge, hosted by the Chattanooga Track Club on Feb. 28th. We've got our game face on and we're ready to lace up our running shoes. We need at least 50 runners to register by Feb. 28th. We're calling board members, volunteers, staff, friends of staff, friends of friends of staff....and are strongly considering hiding in the bushes downtown and accosting random runners.

So why would you be interested in running anyway? We found Nike's Top Ten Reasons to Run and would like to share them with you for your enjoyment.

10 - So you can get up and run at 6 AM before work, when it is 20 degrees outside and all you want to do is sleep another hour, but you know that if you do, you’ll hate yourself the rest of the day.
9 - So your toes can get so ugly to the point that you’re ashamed to wear flip-flops.
8 - So you can tell someone your weekly mileage and get the response, “50 miles?! I don’t even drive that far!” And you can smile and fake a laugh like you haven’t heard it 900 times before. Or they’ll ask how you can enjoy running 26.2 miles and then call you crazy.
7 - So you can double or even triple your shower and grocery bills.
6 - So that the checkout guy at the grocery store gives you a weird look when you’re standing in line with three jars of vaseline.
5 - So you can do laundry three times a week and still run out of matching socks.
4 - So that your muddy, dirty shoes can start piling up outside your door because they’re too smelly to bring inside, and you can listen to your neighbors complain about it everytime you run into them.
3 - So that by the time one o’clock rolls around at work, you feel like curling up under your desk and taking a two hour nap.
2 - So you can eat a huge dinner and an hour later you’re hungry again.
1 - Oh, yeah…the health benefits.

But of course, the main reason why you should run in the Charity Challenge is to support the Partnership and our mission of empowering people to build better lives. We're doing serious stuff to support the community through crisis counseling, intervention, prevention and education. Learn more at www.partnershipfca.com.

Wanna Run? Go now to: www.sceniccityhalfmarathon.com

2009-01-23T06:26:00.002-05:00

The Partnership and Bryan College hosted a seminar yesterday on Human Trafficking, featuring a guest speaker from New Scotland Yard's Operation Maxim Human Trafficking team. We had a great turn out in the afternoon session, from many community organizations interested in finding out what we can do in Chattanooga to prevent trafficking. Our guest speaker stressed how prevention is key, and that we need to monitor our community and raise awareness about trafficking to stop it from becoming a real problem.

Chattanooga Matters, formerly the Chattanooga Resource Foundation, is hosting a public forum on the issue at the Oak Street Center on UTC's campus, February 18th. You can get in on the conversation by visiting www.chattanoogamatters.org to learn more.

Bryan College is hosting their national conference on human trafficking beginning today through Saturday, at Bryan College in Dayton, TN. Visit www.bryan.edu to register online, it's free.

Check out this music video featuring Radiohead and a message about the cost of human trafficking. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdrCalO5BDs

Calling All Runners

2009-01-16T09:01:00.000-05:00

Run, Walk or Volunteer. The Partnership is one of eight charities participating in the 2009 Scenic City Charity Classic half-marathon and 5K walk/run. The event is Saturday, February 28th at Finley Stadium and we need you to participate! We need at least 10 volunteers and at least 50 runners to secure our spot in the event for next year.

If you would like to volunteer, please call Rosemary Miller at (423) 697-3830 or email rmiller@partnershipfca.com. Duties may include working in the water stop filling cups and handing them to runners, serving as a finish line attendant, working registration or food tables. Shifts begin at 6:30 a.m. and last until 1:00 p.m. The first 10 volunteers to sign up will receive an event t-shirt. Volunteers must work a 4 hour shift.

If you would like to run/walk, please go to www.sceniccityhalfmarathon.com and register. Registration for the half-marathon before Jan. 31st is $40 and $50 after the early bird. The 5K walk/run is only $20 before Jan. 31st and is then $25 after the early bird. Make sure to select the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults as your charity of choice! Register today!

If you would like to make a donation to the Partnership, visit my fundraising page by clicking here.

Good Samaritan Story is Uplifting

2009-01-05T08:55:00.002-05:00

I just read a heart warming story in today's Times Free Press - Good Samaritan gives time to kids. The story is about a local woman named Phyllis Williams who has turned into a "third Granny" to the children living in her apartment complex in East Ridge. She meets them at their bus stop, she takes them sidewalk chalk and jump ropes to play with, and even makes them presents to give to their mothers on their birthday. The story is a bit sentimental, but it should be. Our community needs even more Mrs. Williams to go around.

It's not hard to get involved in your community. Just give our Volunteer Coordinator a call at (423) 697-3830 to find out how you can be a good samaritan, too.

What's Your Resolution?

2009-01-02T08:36:00.003-05:00

A recent article in the Times Free Press discusses Chattanooga residents' top three New Year resolutions: losing weight, quiting smoking and reducting debt. All three directly relate to health, whether it be physical or financial. But let's not forget our mental health, which is closely intertwined with both our physical and financial health.

Stress and anxiety brought on by financial difficulties, family problems or other issues can directly impact physical and emotional well-being. As we all think about aspects of our lives we would like to improve this year, let's make sure we are getting to the real root of our problems. Is it the jelly doughnut that we're fighting, or is the real enemy an anxiety disorder with overeating and smoking an ugly by-product?

The Partnership has licensed counselors available to work with individuals and families who are struggling. Call (423) 697-7130 to schedule an appointment and really get serious this year about those resolutions.

2008-12-31T14:47:00.004-05:00

The Partnership is kicking off our 4th annual Cell Phone collection drive to support our Family Violence Shelter and Services. We are working with Shelter Alliance to recycle and refurbish old cell phones - even the broken ones.....even the ones from 1985 that are the size of a brick.

Just bring your old phone and batteries (no chargers, please) to any Partnership office beginning January 5th. We are primarily located at 1800 McCallie Avenue and 300 E. 8th Street in Chattanooga. Drop them in the blue bucket and help us toward our $3,000 goal!

It just takes $74 to cover the costs associated with providing a night of shelter for a domestic violence victim. Since some phones can bring in up to $30, just a few donated phones can help someone escape violence and find safety for their first night.

And Shelter Alliance has a zero landfill policy that assures all phones which cannot be refurbished, will not end up in a landfill. Even the cardboard boxes they are shipped in are recycled! Check out their recycling policy at http://www.shelteralliance.net/company/cell-phone-recycling.cfm.

So fufill that New Year's resolution to get more organized and clean out those old phones in your junk drawer. Help us Break the Cycle of domestic violence, and recycle your old cell phone with the Partnership.

A Partnership Christmas

2008-12-23T13:24:00.013-05:00

What does Christmas look like at the Partnership? If you look closely behind the piles of paperwork and through the hustle and bustle in our offices, you will find true Christmas magic. And a few elves as well.

Many of the individuals and families receiving services from the Partnership require a little more assistance during the holidays, just to make sure children do not go without a visit from St. Nick and elderly have a holiday dinner. There are certain Partnership staff who really do "make Christmas" for families in need, simply by collecting up toys they have gathered all year in anticipation of the need to come. There are local businesses, such as UNUM, whose employees adopt entire families to provide gifts and food. There are volunteers, like those from the Junior League and the East Lake Neighborhood Association, who make sure those with the greatest need are provided for.

So this Christmas, we say "Thank You" to all those who contributed to the holiday cheer our clients will experience this year - all because of you.

This is what a Partnership Christmas looks like:

UNUM's Deb Kee passes a present to Katie Larue at the Partnership while UNUM and Partnership staff stand side-by-side to get all the donated items off the delivery truck and into the building.

United Van Lines donated use of their full sized tractor trailer and four staff, to help UNUM deliver a truck load of toys and food. Santa even came along for the ride.

Toys and Food for 230 individuals, arriving in at the Partnership, donated by UNUM.

The Tennessee Aquarium "Gifts for Guppies", donates toys and cheer to the Partnership every year. Our Youth Services staff above say, "Thanks Guys!"

We have named this generous guy "Biker Santa". He looks tough, but has a big, soft heart! The first annual Hamilton County toy run saw 158 bikers ride to Ultimate Cycle & Scooter with toys and goodies for Partnership families.

Hamilton County Toy Run organizers (Stephanie and Joe), pause for a moment for a group shot. Special thanks to Ultimate Cycles & Scooters and Road Rash magazine for all the support!

The Chattanooga-Hamilton County Medical Alliance puts together a fairytale Christmas party for the families of the Partnership's Family Violence Shelter every year. Pictured here are the organizers and their children, who provided extra help this year.

Beating Holiday Stress, part III

2008-12-12T10:44:00.002-05:00

These final tips can help you enjoy the holidays and experience less stress during this busy time of year. We wish you a joyous holiday season!

18. Recruit a child wrangler. Kids underfoot can add to the stress of big events. Designate one adult to organize games and fun activities in a confined space.

19. Avoid isolation. The holidays can be a depressing time for those who’ve lost loved ones. Get out of the house whenever possible and reconnect with old friends.

20. Help someone who needs you. Nothing melts away personal troubles like helping someone else overcome theirs.

21. Pass down wisdom and tradition. Instead of mourning the passing of better times, keep those memories alive by sharing them with the next generation.

22. Review your life priorities. Combat your hectic schedule by reassessing what matters the most to you.

23. Forgive someone. Let go of past resentments to make room for future happiness.

24. Make a gratitude list. Review it whenever you’re feeling depressed, anxious, depressed or stressed out.

25. Take a time out. Indulge in things you stopped doing because you “just don’t have time for anymore” like a long lunch or a night out with friends.

Beating Holiday Stress, part II

2008-12-10T14:59:00.002-05:00

Taking simple steps can help you beat stress during the holidays. Check out yesterday's post for the first seven pointers.

8. Cut your costs. Give inexpensive but thoughtful gifts like home-baked goods or hand-made photo albums. Bundling several small items around a theme provides a low cost, personal touch.

9. Don’t lose the meaning. If consumerism has you down, check out for awhile with inspirational literature and reconnect with what makes the holidays special and important.

10. Participate in reaffirming activities. Spend time at church and in your community with like-minded people.

11. Take some time off work. Don’t cram all errands and shopping trips into the precious little time you have outside work hours. Avoiding the weekend crowds will allow you to get more done.

12. Do a solo power shopping event. Turbo charge your efficiency by avoiding distractions and competing agendas.

13. Take advantage of the internet. Most sites offer free shipping for the holidays. Find great unique and inexpensive gifts at sites like lillianvernon.com.

14. Ask for help. If you’re playing host, assign chores and duties to your spouse and children.

15. Cheer loves company. Combine household holiday prep with socializing. Ask some friends over for a baking and gift wrapping party.

16. Lighten your cooking duties. It’s perfectly acceptable to cook a main course and ask dinner guests to bring a side.

17. Get on the same page with family. Come to a consensus on what activities are most important and cut out the extras that add work and scheduling pressure.

Check back here tomorrow for the final installment of holiday stress-busters.

Beat Holiday Stress

2008-12-09T16:55:00.002-05:00

If the thought of upcoming holidays fill you with dread, you’re not alone. Many people get stretched pretty thin this time of year by money and social obligations. Here are some ways to keep your sleigh on track this season.

1. Set realistic expectations. Things aren’t going to go perfectly and that’s ok. You can’t control every outcome, but you can prepare yourself mentally by visualizing your calm, positive response to negative events.

2. Get moving. It’s not the chores, shopping, and Uncle Stanley’s visit that’s stressing you out – it’s your anticipation of them! Act now by creating a to-do list, and tackle one or two items per week through the holidays.

3. Avoid the shotgun approach. You’ll accomplish more by tackling one thing at time and giving it your full attention.

4. Budget your holiday expenditures. Set per person limits on gift giving and stick to them. Don’t overlook special outlays for travel, decorations, food and entertainment.

5. Pay as you go. Charging your purchases may delay your bills, but knowing they’re waiting for you in January increases stress.

6. Play to your strengths. Utilize what you have the most of – time, money, or creativity.

7. Pare down on gift giving. For extended family and social groups, suggest each person give just one gift by drawing names out of a hat.

Check back soon for more holiday stressbusters.

Partnership Participating in Scenic City Half Marathon and Charity Challenge

2008-12-08T07:38:00.003-05:00

We just got word that the Partnership has been accepted to participate in the Scenic City Half Marathon and Charity Challenge. The event is Saturday, February 28, 2009, and we're seeking runners, walkers and volunteers for the 5k run, 5k walk, and half marathon.

This is an event the whole family can enjoy, so please join the Partnership team and help us raise awareness and funds for our 23 programs that are empowering people to build better lives.

Neediest Cases Campaign is Underway!

2008-12-05T10:42:00.004-05:00

Each year, the Chattanooga Times Free Press and the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults partner in an effort to raise funds for people in need in our community. Last year's campaign has allowed the Partnership to provide assistance to 350 individuals and families already this year. The campaign series will run on Wednesdays and Sundays through December, and you can find the articles online at http://www.partnershipfca.com/ or http://www.timesfreepress.com/.

New to the campaign this year is the ability to donate online at http://www.timesfreepress.com/.

The Partnership is thankful for this long-standing relationship with the paper through this campaign; without it, many families in our community would be unable to meet their most basic of needs.

Adopt a teen and brighten someone's holidays

2008-12-03T15:37:00.003-05:00

Imagine how good it would feel to recieve clothing, toys or even a gift card for your child during the holidays, especially if you had no way of providing simple gifts -- or even necessities -- yourself. This is what your contribution can do for a family in need this year.

Please help us brighten the holidays for the teens currently residing in the Partnership's four group homes. At this moment, 27 teens still have not been "adopted" for the holidays, and we need your help.

A wish list is available, but any contribution you can make, no matter how large or small, will make the holidays a happier time for a youth who has little to call her own.

With your help and big heart, we can make the holiday season a joyous one. For more information, call 423.755.2785.

Nutcracker Sweets

2008-12-01T11:01:00.004-05:00

Nutcracker Sweets is almost here! The third annual dessert tasting event, benefiting the Partnership's crisis services, is tomorrow night, from 6-8 pm at Bessie Smith Hall. You won't want to miss the live music, delectable desserts, silent auction and gift shop, and our new signature cocktail, the wintertini.

Tickets are $25 each, and can be purchased online or at the door.

Items for sale include wreaths, poinsettias, hand painted ceramic ornaments, crystal jewelry, and insulated coffee mugs, good for free coffee refills at Main & Mocha during the month of January, on sale for just $15 each and pre-decorated, ready to gift.

Have a Helping of Family Fun Leftovers

2008-11-28T07:37:00.002-05:00

Who doesn't love Thanksgiving leftovers? You can't beat that turkey sandwich on Friday or a slice of cold pumpkin pie. But what about all of that family fun and time spent together yesterday? There's plenty of that to last throughout the year!

As National Family Week comes to a close, consider carrying that holiday spirit past the holidays. Why not start a regular Family Fun Night? Life can be pretty hectic, pulling your valuable time away from the family. Designate a special night each week to spend only with your family. Turn off the TV, put away the cell phone and get to know those people living in your house.

There are an unlimited list of things you can do.

Have a story night and read aloud some of your favorite books together, a sort of family book club. Not only will your children's reading skills improve, but you will get a better understanding of their likes and dislikes and even expose yourself to a wider variety of literature.
Pull out those classic board games and show them a thing or two about how to conquer Monopoly. A little competitive fun never hurt anyone, and your children will learn more about teamwork and how not to be a sore loser.
Put on a family talent show and show off your skills. Try for the longest hula hooping, play an instrument or do a magic trick. Recognizing your child's special abilities will help boost their self esteem.

Try out a few of these website for more ideas, or post your own ideas here for others to share!

Pass the Turkey - Hold the Stress, Please

2008-11-26T06:09:00.002-05:00

There are now less then 24 hours until Thanksgiving Day, and hopefully your stress levels are still within normal range. Unless, that is, your normal range is over-stressed anyway. If your family is like the rest of ours, and not exactly up to Rockwell standards, then you are probably already stressing over tomorrow's Thanksgiving Day scene. But stop -- there are things you can do to lower your stress and actually enjoy the holiday with your family.

Do not expect perfection. The day does not have to be perfect, and most likely will not be.

Many people feel extreme pressure to present the perfect holiday to their family. Television commercials and glossy magazine ads would have us believe that the perfect Thanksgiving dinner is attainable with enough decorations and smiles. But it's really okay if the napkin rings do not match the centerpiece, or if you don't even have a centerpiece (and who really uses napkins rings anyway?). The point of the holiday is to spend time with family, not turn your home into a Southern Living photo shoot.

Have a plan in place for difficult relatives.

You can almost guarantee that Aunt Edna will make a veiled attack on your yams, and your cousin Susan will likely reveal way too much about her current boyfriend. These things are as much of a holiday tradition as the pulling of the wishbone, so get ready. For those fairly innocent yet annoying issues, simply think of a response that will diffuse the situation so you can move on quickly. For Aunt Edna, perhaps saying "I hope you like the dish, I try my best. Maybe you have some tips for me that will improve it even more", will stop the passive aggressiveness.

If more serious issues are expected to arise, such as a relative who is verbally abusive, set the expectation with that relative before the big day that absolutely no aggression will be tolerated. By telling that person that you will be forced to leave the celebration, or that they will have to leave, you are letting them know there are consequences to their actions. The outcome may be that they leave the anger at the door this year. If that doesn't happen, and things get out of control, it is in the best interest of your family to remove that person or yourself from the situation and seek professional family counseling. The worst thing you can do is ignore the problem and suffer through the stress of it year after year.

So if you're facing the minimal conflicts that come along with simple personality clashes, just take a deep breath and roll with it. Family quirks are what they are and should not be reason to ruin the holiday. But if you are facing serious issues that affect the entire family, consider seeking professional assistance. The Partnership for Families, Children and Adults offers individual and family counseling to work through the issues of depression, anxiety, stress, anger and many other mental health issues that often debilitate a family. Visit www.partnershipfca.com or call (423) 755-2822 for more information and assistance.

So pass the turkey, hold the stress and have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Caring for Elderly Family Members at the Holidays

2008-11-25T06:11:00.003-05:00

The holidays just wouldn't be the same without grandma's pecan pie and grandpa telling old family stories before the holiday dinner. Or maybe you have a great aunt who completely "runs the show" and the family wouldn't even know how to set the table without her instruction. So what do you do when these beloved family members, because of age, are no longer able to carry out these time-honored family traditions?

It can be difficult to handle the reality of an aging family member during the holidays. Suddenly those holiday traditions you've carried out your entire life seem at risk. You may even be facing depression, stress and anxiety from both yourself and your elderly family member at the thought of changing your holiday traditions. What do you do?

First, remember that all families go through this at some point. Change is inevitable. It's just a matter of how you handle it.

Talk to your elderly family member about sharing the responsibility, or passing the responsibility, of carrying out the tradition.
Include other family members in the discussion so you are not taking on all the responsibility, which means all the stress as well. You may gain a fresh perspective by including siblings, cousins or other family members.
Consider the possibility that you may have to change the tradition altogether and be prepared to consider new family traditions to take the place of old ones. This can be a way to honor your elderly family member by remember together as a family all the fond memories you've had. Make sure to again include other family members in considering new traditions.

If your elderly family member has passed away, make sure to take time to honor that family member. Consider a moment of silence, a prayer or other gesture of respect that fits in with your family's values. Share stories, pictures and talk about that family member. If yourself or others are experiencing extreme grief, consider talking to a professional counselor for help. Loss and grief can be magnified during the holidays and may affect your relationships with family and friends.

If your elderly family member is in assisted living and not able to attend traditional family gatherings, make sure to take the family to that person. Pay a special visit to make sure they feel included in the celebrations.

Need more advice or referrals to local services? Call the Partnership's Elderly Services at (423) 755-2822 for help.

National Family Week This Week!

2008-11-24T05:46:00.003-05:00

It's National Family Week this Thanksgiving week, and what better time to reflect on your own family's strengths and connections? There are many things you can do with your family that will help you build stronger relationships not only with each other, but also with your community. The Partnership is offering tips and suggestions this week on celebrating National Family Week, including:

How to honor senior family members and celebrate old family traditions.
How to have a stress-free Thanksgiving holiday.
How to keep the holiday spirit past the holidays and celebrate your family throughout the entire year.
How to start a new family tradition with a Family Fun Night.

How will you celebrate National Family Week this week? Post a comment and share your own fun ideas and activities with us! Or visit any of the links below for great ideas:

http://www.funology.com/

http://familyfun.go.com/

http://www.familieswithpurpose.com/

http://www.familyeducation.com/home/

You don't have to be perfect to be a perfect parent

2008-11-20T11:29:00.002-05:00

November is Adoption Awareness Month, and we want you to know that there are thousands of teens in foster care who would be happy to put up with you as parents, even though you're not perfect. In fact, the Partnership is currently working with nearly 50 youth in foster care who need the love and stability a permanent family can offer.

Statistics indicate that it would take less than 1 percent of the American population to give every waiting child a home!

If you'd be interested in adopting a teen or becoming a foster parent, contact the Partnership today at 423.755.2725.

Super Market, Super Impact

2008-10-30T10:14:00.002-04:00

EVERY TIME YOU SHOP AT BI-LO AND USE YOUR BONUSCARD® WE EARN MONEY!

SIGN UP AND MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

Simply sign up by giving the enrollment form to the cashier the next time you shop.After that, every time you shop at BI-LO with your BONUSCARD®, you will be helping us earn money. One percent of your purchases will be donated to us. Sign up for this program and your BONUSCARD® does all the work. (You can raise money for up to 3 charities on the same card). It’s that easy!

Pumpkins Against Violence

2008-10-24T11:10:00.007-04:00

Yes, pumpkins can be advocates too. And a group of about 15 unique gourds proved it Thursday night when they were auctioned off to support the Partnership's Crisis Resource Center during Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

The design fest and auction was hosted at Chattanooga Office Supply. COS invited their designer friends with artful eyes, as well as other business colleagues, to a casual get-together the evening of October 23rd. Having never been inside their massive desginer showroom, I was blown away at the beautiful office furniture inside! This is stuff you would want in your house...seriously. The staff at COS graciously hosted the entire event, organizing the food, drinks, guest list and fantastic decorations. Several zombie-like figures wore spooky attire and COS staff name tags and one particularly friendly mechanical tree was perched by the entrance, unexpectedly raising a branch now and then to greet guests.

All of the designers did an outstanding job decorating their pumpkins, eventhough a few felt they needed a little extra inspiration. What began as scraps of designer fabric and globs of paint, ended up masterpieces to complement any Halloween doorstep. Special thanks go to Joy Love and Keith Dupree of Chattanooga Office Supply, Kathryn Love of Design Tex, Miranda Atwood of Groupe Lacasse, Lew Moore of Krug and Shelley Cash of Chattanooga Office Supply. Thanks also to the several ladies from Unum's Facilities Department for offering their pumpkin decorating talents.

Onelia Jewelry Show Raises $300 for Crisis Resource Center

2008-10-21T13:59:00.007-04:00

Nohemi Manuel and her Onelia Jewelry creations occupied the parlor of the Partnership's Crisis Resource Center for much of the day last Friday, October 17th. The full-time Crisis Center turned into a part-time jewelry boutique, complete with beautiful Swarovski crystals, delicious food from Midtown Music Hall, gorgeous decorations by VFrances and curious shoppers.

Ms. Manuel, Onelia Jewelry owner and designer, wanted to give back to the community - and specifically to women and children affected by Domestic Violence - by sharing her talent for design. Not only did she donate a generous portion of sales, but she designed a complete line of jewelry inspired by the Partnership mission and logo. The line includes full length necklaces, bracelets and an assortment of earrings. Red crystals represent courage, purple - strength, white - clarity, green - renewal, yellow - joy.

The jewelry show raised $300 for the Partnership's Crisis Resource Center, which would cover the expenses for approximately 4 nights of shelter for an abused woman.

It's not too late to shop! Just visit http://www.oneliajewelry.com/ and 25% of your purchase will still benefit the Crisis Resource Center. Each piece is presented in a lovely gift bag, enclosed with a card explaning the meaning of the stones and its benefit to the Partnership. Or attend the Partnership's Nutcracker Sweets dessert-tasting event at Bessie Smith Hall on December 2nd from 6-8 p.m. Onelia Jewelry will have a display of the line in the gift shop - making your holiday shopping easier than ever! Call (423) 697-3829 for event details.

Consumer Credit Counseling Comments on "Tightening" of Credit Grip

2008-10-07T09:09:00.003-04:00

The Partnership's Consumer Credit Counseling Director, Charles Hixon, commented in a recent Chattanooga Times Free Press article that "credit is going to be much harder to get and more expensive when you get it", referring to the recent financial crisis on Wall Street and throughout the American economy. Read the Article picked up by iStockAnalyst.com.

Mr. Hixon also added that perhaps the credit tightening isn't all bad, considering many Americans have been "rewarding themselves with...expenses they can't afford". This statement is supported especially in Tennessee, where we have the country's most bankruptcies, per capita.

Some individuals and families have indeed been living beyond their means with no idea what the repercussions would be on their financial stability and their family. However, some were laid off from their jobs and used credit as a crutch to help them through the tough financial struggle of unemployment, or were injured and used credit to help balance medical bills with everyday living expenses. Still many are barely getting by on minimum wage with families to support and are simply unable to make ends meet.

There are countless individuals and families locally who have accrued large debts they cannot pay back, for whatever reason. This financial strain not only threatens the stability of their credit scores and bank accounts, but the stability of their families. Financial stress can affect families on many levels - creating a toxic atmosphere full of anxiety, stress and depression. So what can be done to correct the situation?

Consumer Credit Counseling offers a solution both to those who are already in debt, trying to recover, and those who are in danger of losing their financial stability. This local, nonprofit, face-to-face counseling program provides free budgeting counseling as well as services provided by accredited counselors who can help most families repay their debt and regain their financial freedom from collectors. Think you might need their help? Give them a call at (423) 490-5620 or visit http://www.mycreditcounselors.com/ to learn more and to set up your appointment today.

Teen Dating Violence is Domestic Violence

2008-10-01T08:51:00.005-04:00

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and anyone can be an advocate to stop the violence. Visit our website by clicking the title above to find out what you can do to help end domestic violence.

So what about teen dating violence? Teen dating violence happens when two teenagers are in a relationship and one person uses physical or emotional or sexual abuse to gain power and keep control over the other person. Teen dating violence is very common today. It may include hitting, punching or slapping, but it doesn't have to be physical. It can happen to anyone, at any age, no matter what race, religion, level of education or economic status.

As parents and caregivers, how do we protect and talk to our teens about dating violence? How do we identify abusive behaviors or victimization in our son's or daughter's relationships?

As parents, our values and beliefs are the ones that matter the most and we are the best ones to make a difference in the lives of our teens. We are not their friends, we are their parents. We should know their friends, know when/where they go online, know where they are at all times and ask questions - which could make us very unpopular at times, but may save their life!

It is critical that we talk to our children about healthy relationships before they begin dating and model healthy relationships to them.

Fact: Approximately 80% of people who are abusive in relationships say that domestic violence was part of their family life growing up.

A parent's role in influencing adolescent dating behaviors is crucial. Parents set the example by how they manage their own conflict. Your interaction with your partner and the pattern of parenting you use can either increase or decrease the probability of your child using aggression with others. You can help to interrupt a pattern of violence by intervening if you suspect your adolescent is involved in an abusive dating relationship.

What is a health relationship?

Calm, rather than frantic
Has both friendship as well as physical attraction
Accepts the need for privacy on both sides
Allows for differences of opinion
Doesn't pressure anybody to make a commitment before they are ready
Involves two people who already feel good about themselves
Allows time for getting to know each other
Involves two people who carry good feelings over into the relationship
Won't destroy either party if there is a breakup
Has equal sharing of power and control - neither one dominates, neither one constantly submits
Doesn't make unrealistic demands on either partner
Involves no "ideal" expectations
Involves no stereotypes

Talking to teens about healthy and abusive relationships is important. Teens very rarely report dating violence and may view it as a normal part of a relationship.

Resources: For parents and teens, there are lots of resources to assist in learning about how to discuss this issue. The point is: just do it! One resource is www.loveisnotabuse.com, which is for parents to help begin the discussion about dating violence with your teen. The website www.Tnblue.org also provides valuable information for both teens and parents.

Regina McDevitt

Director, Crisis Resource Center

Building Stable Lives East Lake program Offers Free Community Classes

2008-09-29T13:47:00.002-04:00

Residents in the East Lake community, and those who work with them, now have more resources available. Weekly classes are being offered through the Building Stable Lives East Lake office, including:

Spanish Language Classes for Beginners
ESL (English as a Second Language) Classes
Parenting Classes

These classes are desgined to offer needed skills and tools to the East Lake community and are all available for free. For class availability and additional information, contact Raquel Hidalgo at (423) 867-9784 or rhidalgo@partnershipfca.com. For more information about the Building Stable Lives East Lake program, click here.

Dare to Dance Videos On Sale

2008-09-23T19:58:00.004-04:00

If you couldn't attend Dare to Dance but don't want to miss Manny Rico's disco moves, Frank Burke's moonwalk, or any of our other celebrity dance performances, visit http://www.communitv.org/ to purchase a video of the event for only $20.

Proceeds from video sales benefit the Kidney Foundation and the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults.

Our Celebrity Dancers -Catch Them While You Can!

2008-08-21T23:50:00.002-04:00

Our Dare to Dance celebrity dancers will be making several appearances over the next two weeks in the Scenic City. Continue visiting www.active.com/donate/daretodance to keep up with practice videos and pictures and to vote for your favorite dancer to win the People's Choice Award. Newly added video includes: Keith Cawley (WRCB Ch. 3) and Rachel Withers (WRCB Ch.3), who are, incidentally, engaged to each other! But that doesn't stop them from competing for that shiny disco ball trophy. WRCB Channel 3 will cover updates on the event, including video of Rachel and Keith, each morning at 6:20 a.m. Make sure to check it out! And check out Rachel Withers' blog at www.rachelwithers.blogspot.com.

You can also tune in on Tuesday, August 26th at 8:00 a.m. to WGOW Talk Radio 102.3 with Jeff Styles to hear Frank Burke, Manny Rico and Rachel Withers talk about their practice sessions and the event. Check out the Talk Radio Live Studio Webcams for a bird's eye view of our dancers at http://www.americainter.net/webcam/.

Check out Kim Carson's blog at http://www.us101country.com/pages/us101kimcarson.html and her latest practice video by clicking here. US101 is her proud "Dancer Champion"! Go Kim!

Rachel Oesch at WDEF Ch. 12 continues to promote the event each morning, and continues to practice her routine - which rocks! Visit WDEF's website each day after noon to see video of the morning show and to catch up. Go to www.wdef.com.

WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE DANCER????

Frank Burke Takes Lead for People's Choice Award

2008-08-20T22:20:00.002-04:00

Frank Burke has hit a homerun! Not at AT&T Field, but in the People's Choice Award contest for Dare to Dance. Mr. Burke has helped raise over $2,000 to benefit the Partnership and the Kidney Foundation of the Greater Chattanooga Area. Several of Frank's supporters have pledged their support by making online donations in his name at www.active.com/donate/daretodance. Mr. Burke, owner of the Chattanooga Lookouts, will also be donating a portion of the proceeds from the Lookouts' tennis ball toss at home games scheduled for August 18 - 21 and over Labor Day weekend.

But the contest is far from over! Supporters can "cast their vote" for their favorite dancer by making donations at www.active.com/donate/daretodance. The People's Choice Award will be given at Dare to Dance, on September 6th, to the celebrity dancer raising the most money. Other celebrity dancer totals are:

Missy Crutchfield - $675
Kim Fields - $385
Rachel Oesch - $225
Kim Carson - $175
Rachel Withers - $140
Keith Cawley - $75
Manny Rico - $50

You Gotta Have Friends!

2008-08-18T10:03:00.002-04:00

The Partnership's development staff attended the Tennessee Valley Fundraising Institute (TVFI) last Friday at UTC, hosted by the United Way's Center for Nonprofits. The keynote address was delivered by the Queen of Networking, Andrea Nierenberg. Check out her blog at http://thenierenblog.typepad.com/about.html to see just how she has earned her title! Her speech was reinvigorating, focusing on the basics of relationships - making friends and keeping them, and especially how to avoid losing them. As a nonprofit and a provider of social services in the Greater Chattanooga area, the Partnership understands how important relationships are. We hope our friends know just how much we appreciate them. We could never in 100 years (or in 131?) do the work we do, empower people to build better lives, without the support of our friends. So THANK YOU!

And thank you to Ms. Nierenberg for sharing her experience and wisdom with so many development professionals in our community. Perhaps, as a result, there are hundreds of donors, volunteers and community supporters receiving calls and notes of thanks across Chattanooga this morning.

Dare to Dance Heats Up!

2008-08-13T22:35:00.003-04:00

Our Dare to Dance dancers are each twirling and swirling their way to becoming Dare to Dance Champions. But the competition isn't saving itself for the dance floor - it's out and on the loose at www.active.com/donate/daretodance. Our dancers have been gathering support from their fans to win the People's Choice Award, and fans are putting their money where their mouth is!

As of tonight, WDEF Channel 12's Rachel Oesch is in the lead with $155 in donations, US101's Kim Carson is close behind with $110, and the rest of the pack has the potential to overtake the lead at any time. The winner of this award will receive their trophy at Dare to Dance on September 6th. The deadline for fans to vote for their favorite dancer to get a shot at the trophy is September 5th.

It's easy to vote! Just visit www.active.com/donate/daretodance and click on your favorite dancer to read their bio. Then simply make your online donation. Do you want to be a "Dancing Fan" for $10, a "Dancing Partner" for $25, or a full-fledged "Dancing Queen" for $50? Give more or less - it's up to you! It's all to support two great nonprofit agencies: The Kidney Foundation of the Greater Chattanooga Area and the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults.

And don't forget to buy your tickets! They're going fast. Just click here to purchase.

Dare to Dance Dancers Announced

2008-07-28T21:42:00.002-04:00

Our Dare to Dance dancers are already in the Fred Astaire studio, practicing their moves for the September 6th event! Dean Botting and Nancy Dix, professional dance instructors at the studio, have been working with our local dancers to find the dance that suits their unique personalities and displays their best moves. Our Dare to Dance dancers are:

Frank Burke, Chattanooga Lookouts & MFIC, LLC
Kim Carson, US 101 - check out her blog!
Keith Cawley, WRCB Ch. 3
Chip Chapman, WUUS 97.3/99.3 FM
Kelly Cruise, Brewer Broadcasting
Missy Crutchfield, City of Chattanooga
Kim Fields, WTVC Ch. 9
Rachel Oesch, WDEF Ch. 12
Manny Rico, Chattanooga City Council
Rachel Withers, WRCB Ch. 3

Check back soon for pictures and video of their practice moves!

Dare to Dance?

2008-07-10T23:30:00.003-04:00

Calling all Dancing with the Stars fans!! The Partnership for Families, Children and Adults is co-hosting a brand new, exciting event - Dare to Dance - with the Kidney Foundation of the Greater Chattanooga Area!

We have well-known Chattanooga personalities paired with professional Fred Astaire dancers ready to give an unforgetable performance, as well as a very talented panel of judges! Dare to Dance is scheduled for Saturday, September 6th from 7 - 10 p.m., plus an after-party and chance to show off your own moves!

Tickets go on sale July23rd at http://www.partnershipfca.com/ or http://www.kidneyfoundation.com/ at $50 for general seating and $100 for VIP seating. Tickets will go fast, with Patron tables going even faster. So make sure to go online on the 23rd and reserve your seats!

Stay tuned for the announcement of our all-star "cast" and surprises...

A New Age of Aging Indeed

2008-05-23T11:38:00.003-04:00

It is a New Age of Aging in America and in Chattanooga. According to most recent U.S. Census projections, 70 million Americans will reach age 65 by 2030, double the number in 2003! There will be a greater need for human services to meet the needs of this generation, and the approach of human service agencies will need to adapt to this groups's unique personality.

The Alliance for Children and Families has a new 5-year capacity-building initiative called New Age of Aging, and a new website full of resources and funding opportunities at http://www.newageofaging.com/ . Useful tools include a Senior Housing Directory, Workforce Assessment Tool, and webinars on various topics from the American Society on Aging. Grant seekers can also keep an eye on posted RFP's and mini-grants available for relevant programming. Check it out to stay up to date on the latest research and information relevant to your senior and aging clients!

The Partnership is also proud to be a 2008-09 Mentor Grant Award Recipient! Our talented Beverly Stuckey and Ellie Johnson have been paired with another agency to develop a mentor relationship, motivate leadership, and build organizational and staff capacity related to aging.

Tax Rebate: To Give or To Take?

2008-05-20T15:06:00.004-04:00

To give or to take? That is the question that some are pondering as they receive their rebate checks now through the end of summer. Approximately 130 million Americans will receive their share of the economic stimulus package payout. So...what to do with our new found wealth?

With gas prices continuing to drain our checking accounts, and milk costing even more than gas per gallon - many are using the check to pay for basic necessities. Some plan to pay down debt or to save the money, and still others are buying electronics or other "wants" instead of "needs".

But what if your needs are met? What if you don't want that flat screen your neighbor has? What if you want your rebate to be more meaningful, to create more impact?

Consider donating your rebate to a charitable organization who is serving a population with great unmet needs. After all, the rebates were not planned - they are really small windfalls that with some careful planning and consideration, could be quite meaningful to someone in need. Your gift may even be deductible for federal and perhaps even state income tax purposes.

Check out the Partnership's Wish List by clicking here and look at our long list of items we need everyday to serve our clients. Call up any one of our programs and ask what their biggest need is and how a small donation could make a difference - or ask to come take a tour and learn more about what we do before considering a donation. Believe me when I say that you end up "taking" every time you "give" - you take a sense of community collaboration and support and the confirmation that you have helped someone build a better life.

It could be that you can't afford to make a charitable donation - but you can still give by volunteering your time and expertise. So, to give or to take? Maybe it's a little bit of both. Let us know how you plan to give.

Social Citizens Report Praises Young Activists

2008-05-09T14:46:00.006-04:00

A new report commissioned by The Case Foundation, titled Social Citizens, recognizes the new Millinial generation for their passionate and tech-savy philanthropy - instead of the bum rap they've received lately of complacency and apathy. The 70-page paper provides insight into the motivations of young givers (Millenials are currently ages 15-29), and how their seemingly inborn ability to communicate through modern technology aides them in nurturing those passions.

The Partnership applauds Millenials for their innovative efforts to "change the world", and we would like to share this paper with others as a way to hopefully motivate people to "plug in", get connected, and stay connected . Just click here to start reading. Our agency's programs offer so much to this community; whether it's shelter for domestic violence victims, independence for the elderly, foster care for abused and neglected children, or services for the deaf and hard of hearing. There is a place for those who want to get involved to do so, and in a way that truly resonates with their core values and priorities.

Millenials, Baby Boomers, Gen X or Gen Y......contact the Partnership at 423.755.2702 or email info@partnershiptoday.org and let us know what your passion is. Together, we can empower people to build better lives.

Peyton Manning's Peyback Foundation "Peys it Forward" to Partnership Youth Services

2008-05-01T10:18:00.004-04:00

Fans of local football favorite, Peyton Manning, have something else to cheer about - Manning's own Peyback Foundation has just awarded a grant to the Partnership's Youth Services!

The Youth Services program will soon offer new leadership training to youth served through the Gardner House for Boys and Northbridge House for Girls, thanks to a grant from the Peyback Foundation. Youth Services staff will utilize the Rising Stars Youth Leadership Program to help youth develop their ability to make positive life choices based upon sound values and a vision of a successful future. The program is also intended to help boost their GPA's and to develop positive attitudes and self-confidence, which can reduce risk behaviors. It is designed to help today's youth develop their personal leadership skills and begin to set goals and direction for their lives.

The Youth Services staff are thrilled to have received this grant award and look forward to the impact it will have on the youth they serve.

The Peyback Foundation was established by Indianapolis Colts quarterback and former UT Vols quarterback, Peyton Manning, in 1999. The foundation awarded a record $606,000 this year to charities serving disadvantaged youth in Indiana, Tennessee, and New Orleans. The Partnership's grant award was one of 34 agencies in Tennessee to receive a grant.

Volunteer Extraordinaire - Joy Gibson

2008-04-24T09:38:00.004-04:00

The Partnership is blessed with many volunteers, all of which we would like to say "THANK YOU" to during National Volunteer Appreciation Week (Apr. 27-May 3). But one particular volunteer, Joy Gibson, was recently awarded the 2008 Community Service Award by the United Way Volunteer Center. We would like to share her story about her committment and passion for the Partnership's Family Violence Shelter and Services.

About Joy....

Joy Gibson signed up as a volunteer for the Partnership in February of 2006. After intensive training of over 20 hours, she began serving as a “Hotliner” in July and has maintained a constant service record of at least one four hour shift every week since that time.

The Crisis Hotline serves the community as a “basic” resource for those seeking a broad variety of resources to meet needs, but it is the primary point of contact for those who are facing domestic violence or who have been sexually assaulted in this greater Chattanooga community. “Hotline volunteers are critical to the function of the Crisis Resource Center”, says Regina McDevitt, Director of the Crisis Resource Center. “The Crisis Hotline (423.755.2700) is available 24 hours per day to ensure all victims of violence have someone to turn to. We would not be able to provide the level of care and attention that we do without our volunteers.” The Crisis Resource Center provides crisis intervention services, emergency hotlines, counseling, shelter, and advocacy and referral services to individuals and families in crisis situations. Last year, 5,023 people were served through the Partnership’s Crisis and Emergency Services.

In July, 2007, as the Hotliners were in desparate need of additional volunteers, Joy stepped up not only by covering additional shifts each week, but by agreeing to serve as “team leader” and assume a major role in the complete updating of the Hotliner resource manual. Thanks in large part to Joy's hard work and leadership, the Hotliners are now stable, revitalized and growing. In addition to serving many shifts on the Hotline, she leads each monthly meeting, puts together the monthly calendars of service, and facilitates communications among the team and with the PFCA staff. She averages over 50 hours of service every month.

As a person with lupus, she is a role model for all people with disabilities demonstrating that they too can serve effectively and meaningfully in meeting the needs of our community through volunteer service. John Sims, Partnership Volunteer Coordinator, also notes : "Family call her ‘Joy to the world’ and she is a person who not only lives up to that name by bringing joy to all the staff and volunteers at FVSS with whom she works, but she brings hope through her compassion for callers and the helpful resources offered.”

For more information on how you can volunteer with the Partnership, visit our website or call (423) 755-2702.

Celebrate Earth Day and Support the Partnership

2008-04-21T14:35:00.004-04:00

Earth Day 2008 will be celebrated throughout our community on Tuesday, April 22nd, and it is easy being green! Being a good steward of our environmental resources is as easy as turning off lights when not in use, carpooling when possible, and buying products made with recycled packaging. But did you know that you can "go green" and support the Partnership at the same time? That's right! You can help the area's largest social-service agency in two ways:

Donate your used and unwanted cell phone year-round to the Partnership to be recycled or refurbished and keep them out of landfills! Just drop your phone and battery off at any Partnership office location, including 1800 McCallie Ave. or 300 E. 8th Street in Chattanooga. All phones received are turned into funds that support the Partnership's Family Violence Shelter and Services. Call (423) 697-3829 to find out more.

Become an ePartner and upgrade your Partnership quarterly newsletter subscription to be emailed to you, instead of sent through the mail. You'll save paper, postage, and a trip for the mailman while still getting the latest Partnership news. Simply send your email address to lgilder@partnershipfca.com with Email My Newsletters! in the subject field.

The Partnership would also like to say a special "Thanks!" to community partner Greenlife Grocery for helping raise money for the Partnership's Family Violence Shelter & Services through their Donate a Bag campaign. They raised over $300 by asking customers to bring their own shopping bag and/or donate one back to the store. This helped to save nearly 6,000 bags! Thanks, Greenlife, for supporting the Partnership.

National Sexual Assault Awareness Month

2008-03-27T14:25:00.002-04:00

April is National Sexual Assault Awareness Month and the Partnership wants the community to know about the available resources through our Sexual Assault Crisis Resource Center. Our center is the only facility in the Greater Chattanooga area that offers such an encompassing list of services all under one roof. Victims of sexual assault do not have to fear walking into a police station to report the crime, or sitting in an emergency room for hours to receive an examination. The Sexual Assault Crisis Resource Center is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to provide services in a private, secure setting. The Partnership also offers a 24-hour Crisis Hotline at 423-755-2700 to anyone in need of help.

The Partnership is also offering a support group for adult female survivors of sexual assault called Seeds of Healing. It will be held, free of charge, every Monday from April 14th - May 19th from 6:00 - 7:30 p.m. We encourage you to share this information with your friends, family, and co-workers to let them know help is out there. Visit www.partnership.com to learn more about this program and upcoming events.

A Letter from the CEO

2008-03-25T13:32:00.000-04:00

A LETTER FROM PARTNERSHIP CEO, SANDRA HOLLETT

This is what we believe, at the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults:

When we help people, today’s problem may be successfully managed; when we empower people, their chance of independently managing future problems increases dramatically. This belief has inspired us to adopt, as this agency’s mission: “empowering people to build better lives.”

We empower our clients:
People who turn for help to the Partnership feel powerless: powerless to handle debts threatening their financial stability, to transcend destructive behaviors perpetuating individual and family conflict, to escape physical and emotional abuse, to remain independent and self-sufficient and to advocate for their own well-being.
Every Partnership program is built on “best practices” models, focusing on outcome-based counseling and case management, and working with clients, to develop the skills with which to improve their lives.

We empower our staff:
We strive to create a work environment in which every employee feels him/herself to be a true “partner” whose opinions are valued, professional growth assisted, decision-making encouraged and need for a competitive, livable salary recognized.

We empower our community:
We collaborate and share resources with area agencies, businesses, religious organizations and schools, thereby empowering our community to help its citizens.
We provide opportunities for scores of area high school, college and university students to do their internships and community service hours with Partnership programs, thereby empowering the next generation to build a better community.
Each year, we match an average of 300+ community volunteers with the needs of Partnership clients and programs, thereby empowering both those who receive and those who give.

We invite you to learn more about the Tennessee Valley’s oldest and largest social service agency, now celebrating over 130 years of service, by contacting the Partnership for Families, Children and Adults.

Sandra Hollett, CEO